澳大利亞的護(hù)士Bronnie Ware用了幾年時間照顧那些生命僅剩不到三個月的人。她將他們的故事以及人生感悟記錄在她的書《將死之人的五大遺憾》里。我建議你去了解一下這幾個最為普遍的遺憾,并且一定不要讓自己在回顧這一生時有同樣的感受。
The 5 most common regrets of the dying were:
Number 1: I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
Number 2: I wish I hadn't worked so hard.
Number 3: I wish I had the courage to express my feelings.
Number 4: I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
Number 5: I wish I had let myself be happier.
將死之人的五大遺憾:
1. 我希望當(dāng)初我能過自己想要的生活,而不是別人期待我過的生活。
2. 我希望當(dāng)初我能不那么拼命。
3. 我希望當(dāng)初我能有勇氣表達(dá)自己的感受。
4. 我希望當(dāng)初我能和好友保持聯(lián)系。
5. 我希望當(dāng)初我能讓自己快樂一些。
Notice that NONE of these most common regrets revolve around money or work. Strange how no one said “I wish I worked more at the office” or “Gee I wish I had more cash to take with me”. That doesn't mean you shouldn't work hard, or make money, you should, and you should do it in a way that is in alignment with your purpose, but you should never PRIORITIZE money or work, over things that TRULY MATTER.
請注意,這些遺憾中,沒有任何一條是關(guān)于錢或者工作的。這看似很奇怪,因為沒有人說“要是當(dāng)初能做更多的工作就好了”,沒有人說“唉,我多么希望我能擁有更多的錢”。這并不意味著你不該努力工作或者掙錢。你應(yīng)該做,你應(yīng)該按照自己的目標(biāo)和想法去做這些事,但你絕不該把錢或工作看得比那些于你而言有意義的事情還要重要。
NUMBER 1: I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
遺憾一:我希望當(dāng)初我能過自己想要的生活,而不是別人期待我過的生活。
This was the most common regret of all these people lying on their deathbed. How powerful is that? Such a powerful lesson you should live with, and remind yourself of every day.
這將死之人最常見的遺憾。這個感受有多強烈呢?這個遺憾所帶來的教訓(xùn)非常重要,重要到你需要每天都以它來警醒自己。
BE YOURSELF. Follow your own path. Do what you KNOW is right for you. There is nothing more important. Not just for you, but for everyone you love, everyone who is influenced by your behaviour. When these patients realized that life was almost over, they had the ability to look back with clarity.
做你自己。走你自己的路。做你認(rèn)為正確的事,因為沒有任何事比它更重要。你這樣做,不是單只是為了你自己,同時也是為了每個你愛的人,每個受到你影響的人。當(dāng)這些病人意識到自己的生命即將走到盡頭,他們回顧這一生時的思路更清晰透徹了。
Unfortunately, many of these people saw a life with dreams left unfulfilled because they settled for a life others expected of them, not one they truly wanted to live. Bronnie Ware said:
“Most people had not honored even half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made or not made.”
不幸的是,他們中的很多人看到的,是自己未實現(xiàn)的夢想,因為他們一直在以他人所期待的方式活著,而不是過自己想要的生活。 Bronnie Ware說,很多人甚至來不及實現(xiàn)自己哪怕是一半的夢想,他們不得不等到將死之際才意識到,這一切都是來源于自己做過的或沒能做的選擇。
NUMBER 2: I wish I hadn't worked so hard.
遺憾二:我希望當(dāng)初我能不那么拼命。
Every single male patient had this regret. These men said they had missed out on so much in their relationships and friendships because they simply worked too much.
每一位男病人都有這個遺憾。這些男人說,他們因為過度忙于工作而錯過了太多親密關(guān)系、朋友關(guān)系中的美好。
Everyone has to work. We all need money to get by, and we all deserve an abundant life – to do that, you must wor. But again, learn to PRIORITISE what is really important. Not just with your TIME, but with your ENERGY as well.
每個人都需要工作。我們都需要錢來度日,我們都值得擁有富足的人生,要實現(xiàn)這個,你就必須工作。但,正如我們剛才說過的,你要學(xué)會把你的時間和精力優(yōu)先放在最重要的事情上。
Give the majority of your energy to those you love, and the things you love doing. Choose work you love, work that is more in line with your purpose.
把你大部分的精力奉獻(xiàn)給那些你愛的人和你熱愛的事情。選擇你熱愛的工作,那種和你的人生追求更契合的工作。
NUMBER 3: I wish I had the courage to express my feelings.
遺憾三:我希望當(dāng)初我能有勇氣表達(dá)自己的感受。
As the author said:
“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming.”
正如作者所言,很多人為了人際關(guān)系的和睦而壓抑自己的感受。結(jié)果,他們只能甘于平庸,一直成為不了他們本能成為的人。
It's so sad to hear this, and know how common it is, but it is empowering to know that it DOES NOT HAVE TO BE YOU.
這樣的情況以及它的普遍程度,聽起來確實很令人難過,但請你務(wù)必明白,你,完全沒有必要這樣,知道這一點,你就擁有了力量。
Break the cycle of this toxic thought pattern. Be the influence that changes this in your bloodline.
打破這種對你有害的思維模式。你要自己做出改變,去改變這根深蒂固的思維模式。
Express who you truly are with no apologies. Be yourself, 100%. Never afraid to express your feelings, growing and evolving into more of an amazing human being every day.
表達(dá)你自己的真實感受,不要感到不好意思。做最真實的自己。永遠(yuǎn)不要害怕表達(dá)自己的感受,你要成長,每一天都要變得更優(yōu)秀。
NUMBER 4: I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
遺憾四:我希望當(dāng)初我能和好友保持聯(lián)系。
The author said:
“Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years.”
作者說,通常來說,只有在人生最后幾個星期時,人們才會意識到老朋友有多么重要,然而這時他們已經(jīng)不一定能夠聯(lián)系得上老朋友們了。很多人過度沉浸在自己的生活中,任由如金子般珍貴的友情隨著歲月流逝。
It's easy to take friends, family and loved ones for granted. Especially those you know will always be there for you. But take a moment to think about if you lost one of them. Would you wish you spent more time with them?
我們很容易將朋友、家人和我們愛的人們的存在視為理所當(dāng)然,尤其是那些你知道永遠(yuǎn)不會離開你的人。但,請認(rèn)真想一想,如果你失去他們中的一個,會怎樣?你是否會希望自己能夠多些陪伴他們?
As Stephen Levine said:
“If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call to make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting?”
正如Stephen Levine所言,如果你即將死去,你只能打最后一個電話,你會打給誰?你會說什么?趁你現(xiàn)在還活著,為什么不馬上行動呢?
Maybe it's time to make a few calls.
也許是時候打幾個電話了吧。
NUMBER 5: I wish I had let myself be happier.
遺憾五:我希望當(dāng)初我能讓自己快樂一些。
The author said:
“Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They'd stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The ‘comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives.”
作者說,很多人直到將死之時才意識到,快樂是一種選擇。他們總是拘泥于以往固有的生活方式和習(xí)慣。他們的精神和肉體都總是停留在自己熟悉的舒適圈里。
Never forget those words. Happiness is a choice.
請你務(wù)必記住:快樂是一種選擇。
Happiness is a choice. You can never choose what circumstances show up in your life, but you always choose how you respond.
快樂,是,一種選擇。你不可能選擇生活中出現(xiàn)什么狀況,但你能選擇如何去應(yīng)對它們。
Choose to be happy. Choose by making happy choices. Choose daily habits that put you in a positive state. Choose books, TV, friends that make you feel good, and help you to see the good in others.
選擇快樂,做出快樂的選擇。選擇那些讓你變得積極的生活習(xí)慣,選擇那些讓你感覺良好、讓你在他人身上看到閃光點的書籍、電視、朋友。
No one ended up on their deathbed saying they wished they hadn't been so happy.
沒有哪個將死之人會在病榻上說“我希望我當(dāng)初不那么快樂”。
LIVE FULLY. Playfully. Fun. Happy. Lighthearted.
活出極致,活出興味,活出樂趣,活出幸福,活出自在。
Stories like these shouldn't be sad or scary. They should serve to inspire you. To inspire you to create the changes you need in your life.
這些故事不應(yīng)該你感到沮喪或者害怕的。它們應(yīng)該鼓舞你,讓你去做出你需要的改變。
Life is short, no one knows how long they have left on this earth. Make the most of each and every day, so you get to the end without any regrets.
人生苦短,沒有人知道自己還能活多久。把握當(dāng)下的每一天,你的人生才不會以遺憾告終。