在這個世界上,我最不愿意做的事就是傷害你,但是這件事仍在我的考慮之列。
我真不想傷害你,但你也別逼我。
吾雖不殺伯仁,伯仁由我而死。
2.Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason。
政客和紙尿布有一個共同點就是:他們都很有規(guī)律地被替換,而且因為同一個理由——臟了!!
3.War does not determine who is right – only who is left。
戰(zhàn)爭不能決出正義,但能判出哪方出局。
4.Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad。
知識就是說你知道西紅柿是一種水果;智慧就好似不要把它放進(jìn)水果沙拉里。
知識就是告訴你說應(yīng)該把雞蛋放進(jìn)籃子,智慧則是叫你不要把所有雞蛋都放進(jìn)一個籃子。
5.If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining。
上帝瞅著咱們呢,大伙好歹喜感點吧!
6.I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian
老子拼死拼活奮斗到食物鏈頂端,不是為了成為一個素食者。
7.A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station。。
公車站呀公車停?;疖囌狙交疖囃!0匙郎嫌袀€工作站…
8.Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt。
剽悍的人生不需要解釋
9.A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory。
無愧于心哈?記性不好吧?
10.Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy。
如果女人能做到以禿頂和啤酒肚在大街上晃還覺得自己倍兒性感——此時估計男女能平等。
11.The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room。
小腿上的骨頭——在黑房間里找準(zhǔn)家具位置的好裝備。
12.To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research。
竊鉤者誅,竊國者為諸侯。
13.The sole purpose of a child’s middle name, is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble。
小孩子要中間名,純粹是為了讓他知道他啥時候真的有麻煩了。
起個全名就為了揍孩子前可以底氣十足地喊出來。
賈君鵬這名字就為了讓他媽喊他回家吃飯!
14.It’s not the fall that kills you; it’s the sudden stop at the end。
跳樓的時候,“啊——”的時候還沒死,“啪!”那才是死了。
15.Hospitality: making your guests feel like they’re at home, even if you wish they were
好客就是:讓客人覺得他們像在他們家一樣,盡管你真的希望他們滾回他們家。
16.You’re never too old to learn something stupid。
越活越2
活到老,2到老
17.Just remember…if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off。
記著吧……世界要不惡心,我們早被吐掉了。(提示:看出哪個詞是一語雙關(guān)了嗎?)
18.If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you’ll have trouble putting on your pants。
直譯:如果你始終腳踏實地,那就別想穿褲子了。
意譯:人太老實沒法活。
19.Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine。
世界總是在變,但我卻怎么也便不出來。
人生何處不杯具,唯有面對飲水機(jī)。