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展望2018年:這些大事值得期待

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2018年01月04日

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2018's festivities will take over the city of PyeongChang, South Korea, for two weeks in February. One extremely chill story to look out for: The women's Nigerian (!) bobsled (!!) team will compete, marking the first-ever time (!!!) the African nation is represented at the Winter Games. GET THEM A MOVIE NOW.

2018冬奧會將于二月份在韓國平昌舉行,為期兩周。尼日利亞女子代表隊將參加有舵雪橇比賽,這將是非洲國家首次參加冬奧會。這個冰雪季故事應(yīng)該被拍成電影。

Prince Harry and literal American dream Meghan Markle will get hitched in May. Reports are, it will be an intimate, casual ceremony at a rustic little chapel in Windsor Castle. For Americans, it's a fantastic excuse to wear a funny hat and drink alcohol before noon. As is tradition, the Brits will pretend not to care, but the sudden boom in royal wedding-themed collectible plates and caganers will prove otherwise.

哈里王子和美國夢化身梅根•馬克爾將于2018年5月完婚。有消息稱,兩人將于溫莎堡的一座古樸的小教堂舉行一個私密隨意的婚禮儀式。對美國人而言,王室婚禮是戴滑稽帽子和在中午前喝酒的一個絕妙借口。而依照傳統(tǒng),英國人會假裝不在意王室婚禮,但是忽然間鋪天蓋地的王室婚禮主題珍藏版杯碟和人偶會證實根本不是這么回事兒。

"Frozen" hype is an infinitely renewable resource, and next year the feature-length earworm will come TO BROADWAYYY! While this is very exciting and cool, please remember to be safe. Seek immediate medical help for a "Let It Go" singalong lasting more than four hours.

《冰雪奇緣》電影的熱潮是一個可無限再生的資源,明年這部大型音樂劇將會被搬上百老匯舞臺!盡管這個消息激動人心也很酷,但請記得注意人身安全。如果發(fā)現(xiàn)自己唱《Let It Go》超過四個小時,請立刻去看醫(yī)生。

Just because we're not GOING doesn't mean we can't have a GOOD TIME, okay? This is like the royal wedding of soccer. We are not invited, it has nothing to do with us, but we'll still wear silly hats and cheer like the loud, spectacle-loving people we are. Mark your calendars and choose your teams. June and July belong to the World Cup.

咱們的隊伍沒進(jìn)世界杯不意味著我們不能享受這場球賽,好嗎?世界杯好比是足球界的王室婚禮。我們沒受到邀請,這件事和我們也沒有半毛錢關(guān)系,但是我們依然會帶上傻兮兮的帽子,像愛看熱鬧的人(其實就是我們)一樣大聲歡呼。在日歷上標(biāo)注好比賽時間,選擇你支持的球隊。六月和七月屬于世界杯。

Astronauts Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin place the American flag on the Moon. In 2018, Silicon Valley startup Moon Express says it'll "definitely" land a craft on the moon, paving the way for a generation of rich space casuals to populate it like it's the latest trendy New York City borough. If Moon Mission is successful, it would be the first private company to land a craft on the moon. The company's final goal? To get folks on the moon and mine it for natural resources.

宇航員尼爾•阿姆斯特朗和巴茲•奧爾德林曾將美國國旗插在月球上。硅谷初創(chuàng)企業(yè)“月球快車”表示,2018年“絕對”會向月球發(fā)射一艘航天飛船,為富有的普通人未來在月球定居打下基礎(chǔ)。該公司的設(shè)想是,把月球打造成時髦的紐約大都會。如果月球計劃成功,這將是第一家用自己的航天飛船成功登月的私營公司。這家公司的最終目標(biāo)是向月球移民,開采自然資源。

It'll be a good year to vegetate in front of your television or chosen device if and when reality gets unbearable. Steel yourself for more "Black Mirror" and "A Handmaid's Tale," as well as the last season of "Veep," the return of "Westworld" and Season 16 of "American Idol." Some noteworthy new shows to look out for: "Black Lightning," a "Dynasty" reboot and "The Alienist."

如果現(xiàn)實讓你難以承受,2018年將非常適合長在電視機(jī)或其他屏幕前。準(zhǔn)備好迎接新一季《黑鏡》、《使女的故事》和最后一季的《副總統(tǒng)》,以及《西部世界》的回歸,還有《美國偶像》第16季。還有一些值得關(guān)注的新美劇:《黑霹靂》、新版《豪門恩怨》和《沉默的天使》。

As if the British monarchy hasn't entertained us enough lately, Prince William and Duchess Catherine are expecting their third child in April. They've already done this twice, so royal baby fever is well past its half life. Here are some baby name odds for your amusement. We've got $100 on Henrietta or Boris.

如果英國王室最近提供的娛樂新聞還不夠,還有這一條:威廉王子和凱特王妃將在2018年四月迎來第三個孩子。他們已經(jīng)有了兩個孩子,所以這股王室寶寶熱應(yīng)該已經(jīng)快過去了。已經(jīng)有人開始向王室寶寶的名字下注了,當(dāng)然只是娛樂而已。有人拿100美元打賭第三個寶寶是叫漢麗埃塔或者鮑里斯。

Prior to 2018, in order to fly to Antarctica you either had to be a paying customer on a chartered flight or an extremely misdirected bird. Starting next year, the first EVER commercial flights will head out from the southernmost part of Argentina, and drop you at an Argentinian base on Seymour Island near the Antarctic peninsula. It's good news for penguins -- with the expected tourist boom, their property values are gonna go way up.

在2018年前,如果要飛到南極洲,你要么必須是花錢包機(jī)的客戶,要么是飛機(jī)嚴(yán)重偏離航線。從明年開始,首個商業(yè)航班將從阿根廷最南部出發(fā),降落在臨近南極半島的西摩島的阿根廷基地上。這對企鵝來說是個好消息,到時候游客人數(shù)肯定會大增,他們那兒的地價也會隨之飆升。

Most people find the Titanic disaster at least marginally interesting, but if you're one of the special few who're really, REALLY into its history and lore (and you're super rich), this news is for you. Starting in May 2018, super fans will get an opportunity to take diving trips to the wreck site. Sure, the underwater postmortem will set you back more than $100,000, but travel company Blue Marble Private says the price tag is actually equivalent, after inflation, to what first class Titanic passengers paid for their tickets way back in 1912. Cool! A little morbid, but cool!

大多數(shù)人對泰坦尼克號海難事件多少有點(diǎn)興趣,但如果你是少數(shù)幾個對泰坦尼克號歷史和傳說真的非常感興趣(而且又超級有錢)的人,那么這條新聞就是講給你聽的。從2018年5月開始,泰坦尼克號的超級粉絲們將有機(jī)會潛水到沉船地點(diǎn)。誠然,這個水下參觀沉船項目會讓你花掉超10萬美元,但是旅游公司Blue Marble Private稱,這個價格事實上相當(dāng)于根據(jù)通脹率調(diào)整后的1912年泰坦尼克號一等艙船票價格。挺酷的。雖然有點(diǎn)病態(tài),但還是挺酷的。

Lastly, let us mark our tenuous, yet immortal hope for the future by looking back at the past. 2018 will mark the 100th anniversary of the end of World War I.

最后,讓我們回顧過去,紀(jì)念我們對未來的微薄卻又不朽的希望。2018年將是第一次世界大戰(zhàn)結(jié)束100周年。

So that's your goal for next year -- do something in 2018 that our ancestors will observe fondly every decade or century for ages to come.

這也是你明年應(yīng)達(dá)到的目標(biāo)——在2018年做一些事情,讓祖先們在未來的周年紀(jì)念日能感到欣慰的事情。
 


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