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英語(yǔ)幽默笑話三則(雙語(yǔ))

所屬教程:英語(yǔ)幽默

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2015年08月13日

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frog 青蛙
Frog The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, "Now I'll show you this frog in my pocket." He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply, and said, "That's funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch."
老師正在給學(xué)生上生物課:“現(xiàn)在,我將要給你們看我袋子里的這只青蛙。”接著,他把手伸進(jìn)口袋,卻拿出了一份雞肉三文治。老師滿臉困惑地看了一眼,沉思了一會(huì)兒,說(shuō)道:“真奇怪。我明明記得我已經(jīng)把午飯吃掉了。”
What Was It She Wanted?
A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer. “No,ma’am, we haven't had any for a while, and it doesn't look asif we'll be getting soon.” Horrified,the manager came running over to the customer and said,“Of course, we'll have some soon, We placed an order last week.” Then the manager drew the clerk aside:“Never, never, never say we are out of anything—say we've got it on order and it's coming. Now what was it she wanted?” “Rain.” said the clerk.
一個(gè)商店經(jīng)理聽(tīng)見(jiàn)一個(gè)店員對(duì)顧客說(shuō):“不,夫人,這會(huì)兒沒(méi)有,一時(shí)半會(huì)兒看來(lái)也不會(huì)有。”經(jīng)理驚恐萬(wàn)分地跑到顧客跟前說(shuō):“當(dāng)然,馬上就會(huì)有的。我們上周訂了貨。”然后經(jīng)理把店員拉到一邊:“千萬(wàn),千萬(wàn),千萬(wàn)不要說(shuō)我們沒(méi)有什么——說(shuō)我們已經(jīng)訂了貨,貨馬上就到?,F(xiàn)在你說(shuō)她要買(mǎi)什么?” “雨,”店員說(shuō)。
誰(shuí)欠誰(shuí)錢(qián)
A lawyer's dog, running about unleashed, beelines for a butcher shop and steals a roast. Butcher goes to lawyer's office and asks, "If a dog running unleashed steals a piece of meat from my store, do I have a right to demand payment for the meat from the dog's owner?" The lawyer answers, "Absolutely." "Then you owe me $8.50. Your dog was loose and stole a roast from me today." The lawyer, without a word, writes the butcher a check for $8.50. Several days later, the butcher opens the mail and finds an envelope from the lawyer: $250 due for a consultation.
律師的狗,沒(méi)有拴而到處閑逛,它來(lái)到一家肉店,偷走了一塊 烤肉。店主來(lái)到律師的辦公室,問(wèn)道“如果一條沒(méi)栓的狗從我的商店里偷了塊肉,我有權(quán)利從狗的主人那里要回?fù)p失嗎?律師答道:“完全可以”,“那你欠我 8.50美元,你的狗沒(méi)栓而且今天從我的店里頭了塊肉”,律師什么都沒(méi)說(shuō),馬上給他寫(xiě)了一張支票。一些天后,店主打開(kāi)郵箱,發(fā)現(xiàn)一封來(lái)自律師的信,信上寫(xiě) 道:咨詢(xún)費(fèi)250美元。

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