At first everything went well.Monsieur Héger wrote to me often.He was pleased with my daughters,he said;they were good pupils.But life at home in Haworth was hard.My curate died, and Aunt Branwell became very ill. Emily and Charlotte came home to see her, but she was dead before they arrived.
She was a good woman,Elizabeth Branwell.She kept my home for more than twenty years, and she taught my daughters everything she knew. But she never liked Haworth, I am sure of that.She said it was a cold,miserable place.I hope that God has found somewhere warm and comfortable for her now.
But how could I live without her?My eyes were now very bad,and I could not see to read.And our servant Tabby was older than I was.Anne could not help me—she was a gov-erness for the Robinson family,and now Branwell had a job there too,teaching their young son.So Charlotte went back to Brussels alone,this time as a teacher in Monsieur Héger's school.Emily stayed at home to cook and clean for me.She did not like Brussels,she said.She was happy to do the housework,and live at home with Tabby and me.
She was a strange,quiet girl,Emily.She was the tallest of the girls,and in some ways she was as strong as a man.She loved to walk by herself on the wild lonely moors, with her dog Keeper running by her side.Sometimes I saw her there,singing or talking quietly to herself,and I thought perhaps she could see the people in her secret world of Gondal,and was talking to them.I know that she spent a lot of time writing alone in her room;and when Anne was at home,she and Emily often talked and wrote about the world of Gondal together.
There were sometimes dangerous people near Haworth, so I always had a gun in the house.Before my eyes were bad,I taught Emily to shoot—she loved that.Sometimes I used to practise shooting in the garden while she was making bread in the kitchen.I shot first,then I called Emily.She came out, cleaned her hands, picked up the gun, shot, and went back in to finish the bread.She was much better at shooting than I was.
But by 1844 my eyes were too bad for shooting.Emily cooked,cleaned the house, played the piano.And almost every day she went for long walks on the moors with her dog,Keeper.
She loved that dog, but she could be very hard with him,too.We did not let him go upstairs,but one day Tabby found him on my bed.Emily was very angry;her face was white and hard.Keeper was a big, strong dog, but she pulled him down-stairs and hit him again and again until the dog was nearly blind.Then she gently washed his cuts herself.He never went upstairs again.
Charlotte was another year in Brussels.When she came home,she was quiet and sad.Sometimes she wrote long letters in French to Monsieur Héger,but no letters came from him.But this was a time of hope,too.The girls wrote advertise-ments for their new school,and sent them to newspapers,and to everybody they knew.It was exciting—they were good ad-vertisements,and we waited for the first children to come.
We waited a long time,and Charlotte wrote more advertise-ments.
No children came.
Every day Charlotte and Emily waited for a letter from the postman,or for a parent to come to see them.Every day they became more miserable.
Anne left her job with the Robinsons and came home to Ha-worth.A month later Branwell also came home,for a holiday.
And then one morning,early,there was a knock on the door.Charlotte ran to open it.But it was not a parent—it was a letter for her brother Branwell.He went upstairs with it,smiling.
A few minutes later there was a terrible scream.We ran up-stairs to Branwell's room.He lay on his bed,screaming,with a white face and wild dark eyes.The letter was in his hand.
'Branwell!What is it?What's the matter?'I asked.
He tore his hair with his hands.'I'm ill,'he said.'I'm cold —Oh,what does it matter?She doesn't care...I can't see her...Oh,it's all finished now,finished for ever!I'll die without her!'
'Here,Branwell,drink this.'Emily brought him a cup of hot milk,but his hand was shaking and he nearly dropped it.
Charlotte put her hand on his head.'He's hot,papa,he's burning,'she said.'You must go to bed at once,Branwell.'
He went to bed,and he lay there,sometimes sleeping,some-times shouting and crying.I tried to talk to him,but I couldn't understand what he said.Then,later,Anne explaind.
She told us a terrible story.I was so angry!I nearly broke a chair with my hands as I listened.My son Branwell,Anne said,was in love with Mrs Robinson,the rich mother of his pupil.For months this lady had spoken kindly to Branwell,walked with him in the garden,talked to him alone in the evenings.He tnought she would marry him when her husband died.And then there were other things,that Anne did not want to speak about.
The letter was from Mr Robinson.He was often ill,Anne told us,but his children knew about Branwell and their mother,and the servants knew too,I think.Perhaps Mr Robin-son had learnt something from them,or perhaps that woman(I cannot call her a wife) had told him everything.Only one thing was certain—in his letter Mr Robinson had ordered Branwell never to return to his house or to speak to any of his family again.
My face was hot and my hands were shaking.I tried to talk to Branwell about it,but it was impossible.
'I love her,papa!'he shouted.'You don't understand—how can you?You've never seen her!'
'I don't want to see her,my son,'I said.'I understand that she is a bad,evil woman.I hope that God will punish her and…'
'Don't say that,papa!'he screamed.'You are talking about the woman I love!She will call me back!I will see her again!'
'I hope you never see her again,my son,'I said.'You must forget her.Branwell,listen to me…'
But he did not listen.He ran out of the house.He did not come back until the evening,and then he was drunk.He did not listen that day,or the next day,or any day.He began to drink laudanum as well.I thought he would kill himself.
So I think Charlotte was pleased that no parents came.No school could have a man like Branwell in it.
起先每件事都進展順利,埃熱先生時常給我寫信,他說和我的女兒們相處愉快,她們都是好學生,可是在霍沃斯,家里的生活變得艱難了。我的副牧師死了,布蘭韋爾姨媽病得很重。愛米麗和夏洛特趕回來看她,可她還是在她們到家之前就去世了。
伊麗莎白·布蘭韋爾是個好女人,她管理我們家二十多年,她盡自己所知教育我的女兒們。但我肯定她從未喜歡過霍沃斯。她說這地方又寒冷又悲慘。我希望上帝現(xiàn)在為她準備了一個溫暖而舒適的地方。
但是沒有她我還怎么過日子?我的視力現(xiàn)在糟糕透頂,已經無法看書了。而我們的老用人泰比比我歲數還大。安妮也幫不上忙——她是羅賓遜家的家庭教師,現(xiàn)在布蘭韋爾也在那兒教他們的小兒子。所以夏洛蒂只好一個人回布魯塞爾,這回她成了埃熱先生學校的老師。愛米麗留在家里為我們做飯和打掃房子。她說她不喜歡布魯塞爾。她喜歡做家務,喜歡和泰比及我一起在家里生活。
愛米麗是個奇怪而安靜的姑娘。兒女中數她個子最高,某些方面她像個男人一樣堅強。她喜歡獨自在荒野中漫步,“管家”總跟在她旁邊跑著,有時我看見她在那里輕輕地給自己唱歌、說話。我覺得她能看見神秘的哥恩達爾世界中的人物,并和他們交談。我知道她花了大量的時間在房間里一個人寫作。當安妮回家時,她倆經常一起寫哥恩達爾世界的故事。
有時霍沃斯附近會出現(xiàn)一些危險人物,所以我家中常備著槍。在我視力變壞以前,我曾教愛米麗射擊——她也喜歡射擊。有時我在花園里練槍法,她在廚房做面包,我先打,然后叫愛米麗,她出來擦干凈手,拿起槍,扣一下扳機,然后又回廚房接著做面包。她打得可比我好多了。
但是到了1844年,我的視力糟得不能射擊了。愛米麗做飯、打掃屋子、彈琴,幾乎每天都和“管家”在荒野中走很遠的路。
她愛那條狗,但也對它很嚴厲,它不能上樓??墒怯幸惶焯┍劝l(fā)現(xiàn)它睡在我的床上。愛米麗非常生氣,臉變得蒼白、陰沉。“管家”是一條大狗,但是她一把就將它拖下樓,把它揍來揍去,幾乎打瞎了。然后她自己又輕輕地給它洗傷。從此它再也沒有上過樓。
夏洛蒂在布魯塞爾又呆了一年。再回家時她變得沉默、憂傷。有時她用法語給埃熱先生寫長長的信,但沒有收到回信。不過這段時間也充滿著希望,女兒們?yōu)樗齻兊男聦W校寫廣告,寄給報社,寄給她們認識的所有人。真令人興奮——那些出色的廣告,我們期待著第一批學生的到來。
我們等了很久,同時夏洛蒂又寫了更多的廣告。
可是沒有孩子來。
每天夏洛蒂和愛米麗都等著郵差送信,期待著某一對父母來找她們。一天又一天她們都變得越發(fā)傷心。
安妮辭去了她在羅賓遜家中的工作,回到霍沃斯的家中。一個月后,布蘭韋爾也回家來度假。
一天清早,一陣敲門聲響了起來。夏洛蒂跑過去開門,但那不是某一對父母,而是一封給她弟弟布蘭韋爾的信。他微笑著拿上樓去了。
幾分鐘后房間里傳出來一聲可怕的尖叫。我們跑上樓,沖進布蘭韋爾的房間。他躺在床上,尖叫著,臉色蒼白,深色眼睛流露出狂野的神色。那封信緊緊攥在他手里。
“布蘭韋爾,那是什么信?你怎么了?”我問。
他雙手撕扯著頭發(fā)。“我生病了。”他說,“我覺得冷——噢,那又怎么樣,她并不關心……我見不到她了……噢,現(xiàn)在全完了,永遠完了!沒有她我會死的!”
“來吧,布蘭韋爾,把這個喝了。”愛米麗端來一杯熱牛奶,可他雙手顫抖得幾乎拿不住杯子。
夏洛蒂用手試試他的頭。“好燙呀,爸爸。他在發(fā)燒。”她說,“你必須立即躺下,布蘭韋爾。”
他上了床,躺在那兒,一會睡著了,但一會兒又大喊大叫。我試著和他說話,卻弄不明白他在說什么。后來安妮解釋了一切。
她告訴了我們一個可怕的故事。我非常生氣!聽的時候差點把一把椅子捏碎了。我的兒子布蘭韋爾,安妮說,愛上了羅賓遜太太,就是他那學生的有錢母親。有幾個月,這個女人對布蘭韋爾甜言蜜語,和他在花園散步,晚上和他單獨談話。他覺得等她丈夫死后,她就會嫁給他。后來又發(fā)生了別的事情,安妮不想說了。
信是羅賓遜先生寫的。他時常生病,安妮說。可他的孩子們知道布蘭韋爾和他們母親的事情。我猜想連用人可能也知道了。也許羅賓遜先生從他倆那兒看出了什么,或許那個女人(我無法稱她為一個妻子)已經告訴了他一切。只有一件事是肯定的——在信中羅賓遜先生命令布蘭韋爾永遠不得踏進他的家門,也不能再與他的家人講話。
我的臉在發(fā)燒,雙手顫抖。我想和布蘭韋爾談談這事,但不可能。
“我愛她,爸爸!”他喊道,“你不懂,你怎么能懂呢?你又從未見過她!”
“我不想見她,兒子。”我說,“我只懂得她是個壞女人,一個邪惡的女人。我希望上帝懲罰她……”
“別說了,爸爸!”他聲嘶力竭地喊道,“你在說一個我愛的女人!她會叫我回去的!我會再見到她的。”
“我希望你不要再見她了,兒子。”我說,“你必須忘了她。布蘭韋爾,聽我說……”
但他沒有聽,他從房間里沖了出去,直到晚上才回來,已是醉醺醺的了。那天他沒有聽我說完,第二天也沒有,以后再也沒有。他還開始喝鴉片酊,我覺得他會害死自己的。
所以我覺得夏洛蒂會高興沒有學生父母來。沒有哪所學校能容得下布蘭韋爾這樣的人。
6 埃熱先生和羅賓遜太太
At first everything went well.Monsieur Héger wrote to me often.He was pleased with my daughters,he said;they were good pupils.But life at home in Haworth was hard.My curate died, and Aunt Branwell became very ill. Emily and Charlotte came home to see her, but she was dead before they arrived.
起先每件事都進展順利,埃熱先生時常給我寫信,他說和我的女兒們相處愉快,她們都是好學生,可是在霍沃斯,家里的生活變得艱難了。我的副牧師死了,布蘭韋爾姨媽病得很重。愛米麗和夏洛特趕回來看她,可她還是在她們到家之前就去世了。
She was a good woman,Elizabeth Branwell.She kept my home for more than twenty years, and she taught my daughters everything she knew. But she never liked Haworth, I am sure of that.She said it was a cold,miserable place.I hope that God has found somewhere warm and comfortable for her now.
伊麗莎白·布蘭韋爾是個好女人,她管理我們家二十多年,她盡自己所知教育我的女兒們。但我肯定她從未喜歡過霍沃斯。她說這地方又寒冷又悲慘。我希望上帝現(xiàn)在為她準備了一個溫暖而舒適的地方。
But how could I live without her?My eyes were now very bad,and I could not see to read.And our servant Tabby was older than I was.Anne could not help me—she was a gov-erness for the Robinson family,and now Branwell had a job there too,teaching their young son.So Charlotte went back to Brussels alone,this time as a teacher in Monsieur Héger's school.Emily stayed at home to cook and clean for me.She did not like Brussels,she said.She was happy to do the housework,and live at home with Tabby and me.
但是沒有她我還怎么過日子?我的視力現(xiàn)在糟糕透頂,已經無法看書了。而我們的老用人泰比比我歲數還大。安妮也幫不上忙——她是羅賓遜家的家庭教師,現(xiàn)在布蘭韋爾也在那兒教他們的小兒子。所以夏洛蒂只好一個人回布魯塞爾,這回她成了埃熱先生學校的老師。愛米麗留在家里為我們做飯和打掃房子。她說她不喜歡布魯塞爾。她喜歡做家務,喜歡和泰比及我一起在家里生活。
She was a strange,quiet girl,Emily.She was the tallest of the girls,and in some ways she was as strong as a man.She loved to walk by herself on the wild lonely moors, with her dog Keeper running by her side.Sometimes I saw her there,singing or talking quietly to herself,and I thought perhaps she could see the people in her secret world of Gondal,and was talking to them.I know that she spent a lot of time writing alone in her room;and when Anne was at home,she and Emily often talked and wrote about the world of Gondal together.
愛米麗是個奇怪而安靜的姑娘。兒女中數她個子最高,某些方面她像個男人一樣堅強。她喜歡獨自在荒野中漫步,“管家”總跟在她旁邊跑著,有時我看見她在那里輕輕地給自己唱歌、說話。我覺得她能看見神秘的哥恩達爾世界中的人物,并和他們交談。我知道她花了大量的時間在房間里一個人寫作。當安妮回家時,她倆經常一起寫哥恩達爾世界的故事。
There were sometimes dangerous people near Haworth, so I always had a gun in the house.Before my eyes were bad,I taught Emily to shoot—she loved that.Sometimes I used to practise shooting in the garden while she was making bread in the kitchen.I shot first,then I called Emily.She came out, cleaned her hands, picked up the gun, shot, and went back in to finish the bread.She was much better at shooting than I was.
有時霍沃斯附近會出現(xiàn)一些危險人物,所以我家中常備著槍。在我視力變壞以前,我曾教愛米麗射擊——她也喜歡射擊。有時我在花園里練槍法,她在廚房做面包,我先打,然后叫愛米麗,她出來擦干凈手,拿起槍,扣一下扳機,然后又回廚房接著做面包。她打得可比我好多了。
But by 1844 my eyes were too bad for shooting.Emily cooked,cleaned the house, played the piano.And almost every day she went for long walks on the moors with her dog,Keeper.
但是到了1844年,我的視力糟得不能射擊了。愛米麗做飯、打掃屋子、彈琴,幾乎每天都和“管家”在荒野中走很遠的路。
She loved that dog, but she could be very hard with him,too.We did not let him go upstairs,but one day Tabby found him on my bed.Emily was very angry;her face was white and hard.Keeper was a big, strong dog, but she pulled him down-stairs and hit him again and again until the dog was nearly blind.Then she gently washed his cuts herself.He never went upstairs again.
她愛那條狗,但也對它很嚴厲,它不能上樓??墒怯幸惶焯┍劝l(fā)現(xiàn)它睡在我的床上。愛米麗非常生氣,臉變得蒼白、陰沉。“管家”是一條大狗,但是她一把就將它拖下樓,把它揍來揍去,幾乎打瞎了。然后她自己又輕輕地給它洗傷。從此它再也沒有上過樓。
Charlotte was another year in Brussels.When she came home,she was quiet and sad.Sometimes she wrote long letters in French to Monsieur Héger,but no letters came from him.But this was a time of hope,too.The girls wrote advertise-ments for their new school,and sent them to newspapers,and to everybody they knew.It was exciting—they were good ad-vertisements,and we waited for the first children to come.
夏洛蒂在布魯塞爾又呆了一年。再回家時她變得沉默、憂傷。有時她用法語給埃熱先生寫長長的信,但沒有收到回信。不過這段時間也充滿著希望,女兒們?yōu)樗齻兊男聦W校寫廣告,寄給報社,寄給她們認識的所有人。真令人興奮——那些出色的廣告,我們期待著第一批學生的到來。
We waited a long time,and Charlotte wrote more advertise-ments.
我們等了很久,同時夏洛蒂又寫了更多的廣告。
No children came.
可是沒有孩子來。
Every day Charlotte and Emily waited for a letter from the postman,or for a parent to come to see them.Every day they became more miserable.
每天夏洛蒂和愛米麗都等著郵差送信,期待著某一對父母來找她們。一天又一天她們都變得越發(fā)傷心。
Anne left her job with the Robinsons and came home to Ha-worth.A month later Branwell also came home,for a holiday.
安妮辭去了她在羅賓遜家中的工作,回到霍沃斯的家中。一個月后,布蘭韋爾也回家來度假。
And then one morning,early,there was a knock on the door.Charlotte ran to open it.But it was not a parent—it was a letter for her brother Branwell.He went upstairs with it,smiling.
一天清早,一陣敲門聲響了起來。夏洛蒂跑過去開門,但那不是某一對父母,而是一封給她弟弟布蘭韋爾的信。他微笑著拿上樓去了。
A few minutes later there was a terrible scream.We ran up-stairs to Branwell's room.He lay on his bed,screaming,with a white face and wild dark eyes.The letter was in his hand.
幾分鐘后房間里傳出來一聲可怕的尖叫。我們跑上樓,沖進布蘭韋爾的房間。他躺在床上,尖叫著,臉色蒼白,深色眼睛流露出狂野的神色。那封信緊緊攥在他手里。
'Branwell!What is it?What's the matter?'I asked.
“布蘭韋爾,那是什么信?你怎么了?”我問。
He tore his hair with his hands.'I'm ill,'he said.'I'm cold —Oh,what does it matter?She doesn't care...I can't see her...Oh,it's all finished now,finished for ever!I'll die without her!'
他雙手撕扯著頭發(fā)。“我生病了。”他說,“我覺得冷——噢,那又怎么樣,她并不關心……我見不到她了……噢,現(xiàn)在全完了,永遠完了!沒有她我會死的!”
'Here,Branwell,drink this.'Emily brought him a cup of hot milk,but his hand was shaking and he nearly dropped it.
“來吧,布蘭韋爾,把這個喝了。”愛米麗端來一杯熱牛奶,可他雙手顫抖得幾乎拿不住杯子。
Charlotte put her hand on his head.'He's hot,papa,he's burning,'she said.'You must go to bed at once,Branwell.'
夏洛蒂用手試試他的頭。“好燙呀,爸爸。他在發(fā)燒。”她說,“你必須立即躺下,布蘭韋爾。”
He went to bed,and he lay there,sometimes sleeping,some-times shouting and crying.I tried to talk to him,but I couldn't understand what he said.Then,later,Anne explaind.
他上了床,躺在那兒,一會睡著了,但一會兒又大喊大叫。我試著和他說話,卻弄不明白他在說什么。后來安妮解釋了一切。
She told us a terrible story.I was so angry!I nearly broke a chair with my hands as I listened.My son Branwell,Anne said,was in love with Mrs Robinson,the rich mother of his pupil.For months this lady had spoken kindly to Branwell,walked with him in the garden,talked to him alone in the evenings.He tnought she would marry him when her husband died.And then there were other things,that Anne did not want to speak about.
她告訴了我們一個可怕的故事。我非常生氣!聽的時候差點把一把椅子捏碎了。我的兒子布蘭韋爾,安妮說,愛上了羅賓遜太太,就是他那學生的有錢母親。有幾個月,這個女人對布蘭韋爾甜言蜜語,和他在花園散步,晚上和他單獨談話。他覺得等她丈夫死后,她就會嫁給他。后來又發(fā)生了別的事情,安妮不想說了。
The letter was from Mr Robinson.He was often ill,Anne told us,but his children knew about Branwell and their mother,and the servants knew too,I think.Perhaps Mr Robin-son had learnt something from them,or perhaps that woman(I cannot call her a wife) had told him everything.Only one thing was certain—in his letter Mr Robinson had ordered Branwell never to return to his house or to speak to any of his family again.
信是羅賓遜先生寫的。他時常生病,安妮說??伤暮⒆觽冎啦继m韋爾和他們母親的事情。我猜想連用人可能也知道了。也許羅賓遜先生從他倆那兒看出了什么,或許那個女人(我無法稱她為一個妻子)已經告訴了他一切。只有一件事是肯定的——在信中羅賓遜先生命令布蘭韋爾永遠不得踏進他的家門,也不能再與他的家人講話。
My face was hot and my hands were shaking.I tried to talk to Branwell about it,but it was impossible.
我的臉在發(fā)燒,雙手顫抖。我想和布蘭韋爾談談這事,但不可能。
'I love her,papa!'he shouted.'You don't understand—how can you?You've never seen her!'
“我愛她,爸爸!”他喊道,“你不懂,你怎么能懂呢?你又從未見過她!”
'I don't want to see her,my son,'I said.'I understand that she is a bad,evil woman.I hope that God will punish her and…'
“我不想見她,兒子。”我說,“我只懂得她是個壞女人,一個邪惡的女人。我希望上帝懲罰她……”
'Don't say that,papa!'he screamed.'You are talking about the woman I love!She will call me back!I will see her again!'
“別說了,爸爸!”他聲嘶力竭地喊道,“你在說一個我愛的女人!她會叫我回去的!我會再見到她的。”
'I hope you never see her again,my son,'I said.'You must forget her.Branwell,listen to me…'
“我希望你不要再見她了,兒子。”我說,“你必須忘了她。布蘭韋爾,聽我說……”
But he did not listen.He ran out of the house.He did not come back until the evening,and then he was drunk.He did not listen that day,or the next day,or any day.He began to drink laudanum as well.I thought he would kill himself.
但他沒有聽,他從房間里沖了出去,直到晚上才回來,已是醉醺醺的了。那天他沒有聽我說完,第二天也沒有,以后再也沒有。他還開始喝鴉片酊,我覺得他會害死自己的。
So I think Charlotte was pleased that no parents came.No school could have a man like Branwell in it.
所以我覺得夏洛蒂會高興沒有學生父母來。沒有哪所學校能容得下布蘭韋爾這樣的人。