10堂人生課 Ten Life Classes

There are so many lessons I wish I had learned while I was young enough to appreciate and apply them. The thing with wisdom, and often with life lessons in general, is that they’re learned in retrospect, long after we needed them. The good news is that other people can benefit from our experiences and the lessons we’ve learned.

我無(wú)比希望年輕的時(shí)候?qū)W到足夠多的東西，好好理解，好好利用。然而，關(guān)乎智慧以及人生課堂，往往都是在事過(guò)境遷之后的反思中才能得以領(lǐng)悟。我們這些過(guò)來(lái)人也十分愿意與你們分享經(jīng)歷，以及我們領(lǐng)悟到的人生課。

1. Money will NEVER solve your real problems

錢不能解決你的實(shí)際問(wèn)題

Money is a tool; a commodity that buys you necessities and some nice “wants,” but it is not the panacea to your problems. There are a great many people who are living on very little, yet have wonderfully full and happy lives… and there are sadly a great many people are living on quite a lot, yet have terribly miserable lives.

金錢只是個(gè)工具，能買到生活所需和一些不錯(cuò)的“必需品”，但不是解決你問(wèn)題的萬(wàn)能藥。有很多人雖然沒(méi)有很多錢，但仍然過(guò)著充實(shí)愉快的生活，相反，有些人十分富有，卻活得并不幸福。

Money can buy a nice home, a great car, fabulous shoes, even a bit of security and some creature comforts, but it cannot fix a broken relationship, or cure loneliness, and the “happiness” it brings is only fleeting and not the kind that really and truly matters. Happiness is not for sale. If you’re expecting the “stuff” you can buy to “make it better,” you will never be happy.

錢能買來(lái)好房子、好車子、漂亮的鞋子，以及一些安全感和舒適度，但卻無(wú)法修復(fù)一段破碎的關(guān)系，無(wú)法治愈孤獨(dú)，它所帶來(lái)的幸福感轉(zhuǎn)瞬即逝也并不實(shí)在。幸福不能靠錢來(lái)買。如果你總是希望考買什么來(lái)獲得幸福，你永遠(yuǎn)都不會(huì)幸福。

2. Pace yourself

放慢腳步

Often when we’re young, just beginning our adult journey we feel as though we have to do everything at once. We need to decide everything, plan out our lives, experience everything, get to the top, find true love, figure out our life’s purpose, and do it all at the same time.

年輕的時(shí)候，我們總覺(jué)得成人之路剛剛開(kāi)始，總想一次把所有事都完成。我們需要為所有事作出決定，進(jìn)行人生規(guī)劃，體驗(yàn)所有的事情，達(dá)到頂峰，找到真愛(ài)，發(fā)現(xiàn)我們?nèi)松哪繕?biāo)，所有的都同時(shí)完成。

Slow down—don’t rush into things. Let your life unfold. Wait a bit to see where it takes you, and take time to weigh your options. Enjoy every bite of food, take time to look around you, let the other person finish their side of the conversation. Allow yourself time to think, to mull a bit. Taking action is critical. Working towards your goals and making plans for the future is commendable and often very useful, but rushing full-speed ahead towards anything is a one-way ticket to burnout and a good way to miss your life as it passes you by.

慢點(diǎn)吧，別太著急。慢慢開(kāi)始自己的生活，等等看看自己到了什么地方，花點(diǎn)時(shí)間去衡量一下自己的選擇。享受每一口食物，花點(diǎn)時(shí)間看看周圍，讓別人完成他們的傾訴。給自己點(diǎn)時(shí)間去思考和沉思。行動(dòng)是十分關(guān)鍵的。朝著你的目標(biāo)前進(jìn)，為未來(lái)做出規(guī)劃的確很值得有用，但全速前進(jìn)似乎是張單程票，讓你無(wú)法回頭，還會(huì)讓你錯(cuò)失路邊的風(fēng)景。

3. You can’t please everyone

你無(wú)法取悅每個(gè)人

“I don’t know the secret to success, but the secret to failure is trying to please everyone” – Bill Cosby

我不知道成功的秘訣是什么，我只知道失敗的秘訣是去討好每個(gè)人——比爾•科斯比

You don’t need everyone to agree with you or even like you. It’s human nature to want to belong, to be liked, respected and valued, but not at the expense of your integrity and happiness. Other people cannot give you the validation you seek. That has to come from inside. Speak up, stick to your guns, assert yourself when you need to, demand respect, stay true to your values.

你不需要讓所有人都贊同抑或喜歡你。希望獲得認(rèn)可、喜歡、尊重和重視，這是人之常情，但別以犧牲你的正直和幸福為代價(jià)。你在追尋的肯定感，其他人給不了，這需要來(lái)自你的內(nèi)心。大聲說(shuō)出來(lái)，堅(jiān)持自己的想法，必要時(shí)捍衛(wèi)自己的立場(chǎng)，要求得到尊重，忠于自己的價(jià)值觀。

4. Your health is your most valuable asset

健康是最寶貴的財(cái)富

Health is an invaluable treasure—always appreciate, nurture, and protect it. Good health is often wasted on the young before they have a chance to appreciate it for what it’s worth. We tend to take our good health for granted, because it’s just there. We don’t have to worry about it, so we don’t really pay attention to it… until we have to. Heart disease, bone density, stroke, many cancers—the list of many largely preventable diseases is long, so take care of your health now, or you’ll regret it later on.

健康是無(wú)價(jià)之寶——要一直重視、呵護(hù)和保護(hù)它。年輕人往往在最值得呵護(hù)健康的年紀(jì)大肆揮霍，我們把健康當(dāng)成理所當(dāng)然的一件事，因?yàn)樗驮谀抢铩Ｎ覀儾幌胍獡?dān)心，所以也從未真正關(guān)注過(guò)它，直到健康出現(xiàn)問(wèn)題。心臟病、骨質(zhì)疏松、哮喘和癌癥——這個(gè)清單很長(zhǎng)，這些病實(shí)際上也都是可以預(yù)防的，所以好好呵護(hù)自己的健康吧，免得以后后悔。

5. You don’t always get what you want

你不可能一直得到自己想要的東西

“Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon

當(dāng)我們正在為生活疲于奔命時(shí)，生活已離我們而去。——約翰•列儂

No matter how carefully you plan and how hard you work, sometimes things just don’t work out the way you want them to… and that’s ok. We have all of these expectations; predetermined visions of what our “ideal” life will look like, but all too often, that’s not the reality of the life we end up with. Sometimes our dreams fail and sometimes we just change our minds mid-course. Sometimes we have to flop to find the right course and sometimes we just have to try a few things before we find the right direction.

無(wú)論你多么仔細(xì)的規(guī)劃和努力，有時(shí)候事情總是不按照你的計(jì)劃發(fā)展，沒(méi)關(guān)系，我們都有些許期待，對(duì)理想的生活有一定的設(shè)想，但這并不是我們真正的生活。也許有時(shí)我們的夢(mèng)想無(wú)法實(shí)現(xiàn)，或是中途改變了想法。有時(shí)我們不得不放棄而去追求正確的事物，而有時(shí)我們需要在找到正確方向時(shí)經(jīng)歷其他的東西。

6. It’s not all about you

世界不是圍著你轉(zhuǎn)的

You are not the epicenter of the universe. It’s very difficult to view the world from a perspective outside of your own, since we are always so focused on what’s happening in our own lives. What do I have to do today? What will this mean for me, for my career, for my life? What do I want? It’s normal to be intensely aware of everything that’s going on in your own life, but you need to pay as much attention to what’s happening around you, and how things affect other people in the world as you do to your own life. It helps to keep things in perspective.

你不是宇宙的核心。的確用你以外的視角來(lái)看世界有點(diǎn)難，我們都太過(guò)于專注自己生活里的一切，我今天需要干什么?這對(duì)我、我的工作和生活又意味著什么?我想要什么?對(duì)自己生活中發(fā)生的一切了如指掌無(wú)可厚非，但你也需要關(guān)心周圍發(fā)生了什么，你生活中類似的事情又是如何影響到你周圍的人的。這樣會(huì)讓你看待事物更加客觀。

7. There’s no shame in not knowing

不知為不知

No one has it all figured out. Nobody has all the answers. There’s no shame in saying “I don’t know.” Pretending to be perfect doesn’t make you perfect. It just makes you neurotic to keep up the pretense of manufactured perfection. We have this idea that there is some kind of stigma or shame in admitting our limitations or uncertainly, but we can’t possibly know everything. We all make mistakes and mess up occasionally. We learn as we go, that’s life. Besides—nobody likes a know-it-all. A little vulnerability makes you human and oh so much more relatable.

沒(méi)有人知曉所有事，沒(méi)有人知道所有問(wèn)題的答案。所以說(shuō)不知道根本不是什么丟臉的事。裝著完美只會(huì)讓你不完美。還會(huì)讓你看上去像一個(gè)神經(jīng)過(guò)敏的偽完美藝術(shù)品罷了。我們必須知道，有時(shí)需要承認(rèn)我們的無(wú)知和不確定，我們不可能知道所有的事情。我們都會(huì)犯錯(cuò)，還會(huì)弄砸一些事情。邊走邊學(xué)，這就是人生。再說(shuō)了，沒(méi)有人喜歡萬(wàn)事通。一些無(wú)知反而能讓你更加人性化，更易接近哦。

8. Love is more than a feeling; it’s a choice

愛(ài)不僅僅是感覺(jué)，而是選擇

That burst of initial exhilaration, pulse quickening love and passion does not last long. But that doesn’t mean long-lasting love is not possible. Love is not just a feeling; it’s a choice that you make every day. We have to choose to let annoyances pass, to forgive, to be kind, to respect, to support, to be faithful. Relationships take work. Sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s incredibly hard, but it is up to us to choose how we want to act, think and speak in a relationship.

迸發(fā)的愉悅，讓你心跳加快的愛(ài)情和激情都無(wú)法持久，但這并不是說(shuō)長(zhǎng)久的愛(ài)情并不存在。愛(ài)與感覺(jué)無(wú)關(guān)，是一個(gè)你每天都需要做的選擇。我們需要選擇忘記煩惱，去原諒，去友善、尊敬、支持以及忠貞。感情需要經(jīng)營(yíng)，有時(shí)很容易有時(shí)似乎無(wú)比艱難。這都取決于我們自己的選擇，到底想在這段感情中如何表現(xiàn)、思考和說(shuō)話。

9. Perspective is a beautiful thing

遠(yuǎn)見(jiàn)很美妙

Typically, when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. Everything that is happening in our lives seems so big, so important, so do or die, but in the grand picture, this single hiccup often means next to nothing. The fight we’re having, the job we didn’t get, the real or imagined slight, the unexpected need to shift course, the thing we wanted, but didn’t get. Most of it won’t matter 20, 30, 40 years from now. It’s hard to see long term when all you know is short term, but unless it’s life-threatening, let it go, and move on.

往往失去遠(yuǎn)見(jiàn)時(shí)，我們就會(huì)變得焦慮和低落。我們生活里發(fā)生的每件事都那么重大那么重要，不做好就會(huì)死，但長(zhǎng)遠(yuǎn)來(lái)看，這一件小事似乎根本就微不足道。我們經(jīng)歷的沖突，沒(méi)有得到的工作，或有或無(wú)的輕蔑，突如其來(lái)的改變航向，我們想要卻沒(méi)有得到的東西。20、30、40年之后，大部分都會(huì)變得微不足道。當(dāng)你的眼光只放在近期，那么很難去看得長(zhǎng)遠(yuǎn)。所以除非是威脅到生命的事情，否則其他的就放下吧，繼續(xù)前進(jìn)。

10. Don’t take anything for granted

別把任何事當(dāng)做理所當(dāng)然

We often don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone: that includes your health, your family and friends, your job, the money you have or think you will have tomorrow. When you’re young, it seems that your parents will always be there, but they won’t. You think you have plenty of time to get back in touch with your old friends or spend time with new ones, but you don’t. You have the money to spend, or you think you’ll have it next month, but you might not. Nothing in your life is not guaranteed to be there tomorrow, including those you love.

很多東西直到失去我們才會(huì)懂得珍惜，這包括健康、家人和朋友、工作，現(xiàn)有或未來(lái)會(huì)有的金錢。年輕的時(shí)候，父母一直在身邊，但他們不能一直陪伴下去;你總覺(jué)得有充足的時(shí)間，和老朋友們保持聯(lián)系或是花時(shí)間和新朋友玩樂(lè)，但實(shí)際并沒(méi)有;你有錢花，然后覺(jué)得下個(gè)月也會(huì)有錢花，其實(shí)也許沒(méi)有。你生活中所有的事情明天都不一定還存在著，包括那些你愛(ài)的。

This is a hard life lesson to learn, but it may be the most important of all: Life can change in an instant. Make sure you appreciate what you have, while you still have it.

這些人生課很難學(xué)習(xí)，但卻是至關(guān)重要的：生活可以瞬間萬(wàn)變。只要好好珍惜現(xiàn)在所擁有的就足夠了。