生活大爆炸 第五季:第9集 佩妮萊納德假約會(上)
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Hey.
嘿。
Oh,hey.You work the lunch shift?
今天是中午的班呀
Yeah. I've got eight pounds of salmon that's about to go bad.
是啊 我還帶了八磅快壞的鮭魚回來
Do you know how to cook it?
你知道怎么煮嗎
Not really.
不知道
Damn it.Should have liberated the iffy chicken.
該死 早知道就應(yīng)該拿那些問題雞肉
What are you and Professor Fussyface up to tonight?
你和那個挑剔鬼今晚有啥節(jié)目
Star Wars on Bluray.
看藍光版星球大戰(zhàn)
Haven't you seen that movie, like, a thousand times?
你們不是已經(jīng)看了N遍了嗎
Not on Bluray.
藍光版的沒有啊
Only twice on Bluray.
藍光的只看了兩遍
Oh, Leonard.
可悲啊 萊納德
I know, it's highresolution sadness.
我知道 都是高清惹的禍
Well, I'm going to take myself out to a movie tonight.You want to go?
我今晚打算去看一場電影 你想去嗎
Really? Do we do that?
真的嗎 我們能去嗎
What do you mean?
你什么意思
You know, we haven't spent time alone together since we broke up.
你也知道 自從咱倆分手以后 就沒單獨出去玩過
Oh, it's not a date, Leonard.It's just a man and a woman hanging out,not having sex at the end of the night.
萊納德 這又不是約會 只是一個男人和一個女人出去玩 晚上各回各家 各睡各床
Sounds like most of my dates.
這是我大多數(shù)約會的真實寫照
Oh, dear Lord, get away from me, you monster!
老天吶 離我遠點 你個怪物
What is that about?
這是怎么回事
Well, he's smart and crazy enough,he may have actually created a monster.
他夠聰明也夠瘋狂 沒準(zhǔn)真造了個怪物出來
Shoo, shoo! Be gone!
去 去 快走
What the hell is going on?
到底是怎么了 hell雙關(guān) 亦有地獄的意思
There's a bird outside the window, and he won't go away.That is the hell that is going on.
窗戶外面有只鳥 死活不肯走 弄得我跟人間煉獄似的
We have no worms or seeds here.Shoo! Shoo!
我們這兒既沒蟲子也沒種子 去去 快走
Really? On top of everything else, you're afraid of birds?
不是吧 這世界那么險惡 你怕的卻是小鳥
It's called ornithophobia.And someday it will be recognized as a true disability,and the landlord will be required by law to put a giant net over the building.
這叫恐鳥癥 而且總有一天 恐鳥癥會被視為一種殘疾 房東必須按照法律規(guī)定給這棟樓加一張大網(wǎng)
Which is unfortunate, because I have a fear of nets.
到時就悲劇了 因為我還怕網(wǎng)
So movies, yes or no?
電影 你去不去
Movies, yes.
去 一定去
Great. I'll see you later.
好 待會兒見
And remember, he's more afraid of you than you are of him.
記住啦 他其實比你還害怕呢
That doesn't help.
說這話一點用都沒有
No, I was talking to the bird.
誰跟你說了 我跟鳥說呢
Go away, bird. Go away, bird. Go away, bird.
小鳥快走 小鳥快走 小鳥快走
Sheldon, just ignore him.
謝爾頓 無視它不就行了
Good idea. Attention is what birds want.
好主意 這鳥無非就是求關(guān)注
Oh, much better. All right.
啊 好多了 好
Now I'll just get along with my life.
我現(xiàn)在可以安心了
Make a pot of tea, Leonard. It's going to be a long night.
泡壺茶 萊納德 今晚要跟它抗?fàn)幍降琢?/div>
Our whole universe was in a hot dense state,then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started. Wait...
我們的宇宙進入了極熱的高濃度狀態(tài)，后來，140億年前它開始擴張。等等……
The Earth began to cool,the autotrophs began to drool,neanderthals developed tools, we built a wall (we built the pyramids),
地球開始冷卻，自養(yǎng)生物開始繁殖,穴居人學(xué)會使用工具，我們開始建墻（我們還建了金字塔）
Math, science, history, unraveling the mysteries,That all started with the big bang!bang!
數(shù)學(xué)、科學(xué)、歷史解開了宇宙之謎。這一切從宇宙大爆炸開始。
The bird's still there?
那鳥還沒走呢
Quick, what does a hawk sound like?
快 老鷹是怎么叫的
I don't know
我也不太清楚
Please, that's a seagull.If you're not going to help, don't help.
拜托 那是海鷗的聲音 你要是幫不上忙 就閉嘴
Sorry. Do you think I'm overdressed?
對不起 我穿得會不會太正式了
It depends on the activity.
這得看場合了
For a prostate exam, yes.
如果去做前列腺檢查 是有點正式
If you're playing Vegas, I'd add sequins.
但如果是扮維加斯 我會加一些亮片 (驚奇漫畫角色)
I'm going to the movies with Penny.I don't want her to think that I think it's a date.
我是要跟佩妮去看電影 我不想讓她認為 我認為是約會
Do you think it's a date?
你認為是約會嗎
No, but she might think I think it's a date even though I don't.
不 但她會認為我是這么認為 但其實我不是
Or you might think she thinks you think it's a date even though she doesn't.
說不定是你認為她認為你這么認為 其實她不是
Are we overthinking this? Not at all.
我們是不是想太多了 絕對沒有
You're right. I'm fine. I'm wearing this.
你說得對 算了 我就這么穿吧
Really? A blazer? All right.
不是吧 西裝? 好吧
Yes, hello.This is Dr. Sheldon Cooper.I'm at 2311 North Robles Avenue.I'd like to report a dangerous wild animal.
喂 你好 我是謝爾頓·庫珀博士 我住在羅夫萊斯北大街2311號 我這里有一只危險的野生動物
A blue jay.
一只藍冠鴉
I'm sorry, this is Animal Control.I don't understand the laughter.
不好意思 我找的就是動物管理部門 我不明白你笑什么
No, the bird is not in my home.If he was in my home, I obviously would have called 911.
不 那只鳥不在我家里 它要是在我家里 我早就打911報警了
Sir, I have no doubt that there are things that you're frightened of.
先生 我相信你也有害怕的東西
Being stuck in a deadend public service job.
比如從事沒前途的公共服務(wù)工作
Or your wife stepping out on you because you're stuck in a deadend public service job.Or spiders.
或者你老婆背叛你 因為你從事的是沒前途的公共服務(wù)工作 又或者你怕蜘蛛
Don't you think I tried making cat noises?
學(xué)貓叫有用的話 打電話給你干嘛
Too casual?
會不會太休閑了
For an audience with the queen, yes.
去覲見女王的話 是太休閑了
For an evening of passing a bottle of fortified wine around a flaming trash can, you look great.
不過晚上去著火的垃圾箱旁邊扔一瓶烈酒 你的著裝正合適
What am I thinking? Whiskers.
我想啥呢 居然沒畫胡子
Oh, hey, if we hurry, we can make the new Jennifer Aniston movie.
現(xiàn)在買票的話 能趕上珍妮弗·安妮斯頓的新電影
Oh, yeah, sure.There's also an amazing documentary about building a dam on a river in South America.
對 沒錯 不過還有一場精彩的紀(jì)錄片講述在南美洲的一條河上建一座水壩
Okay, but the Jennifer Aniston movie has Jennifer Aniston,and she's not building a dam.
可珍妮弗·安妮斯頓的電影里有珍妮弗·安妮斯頓而且她不會建什么水壩
Can't argue with that.
這倒是真的
I'll get the tickets. Okay.
我去買票 好
Actually, you know what?I think it's about time I picked a movie we see.
等等 其實呢 我覺得現(xiàn)在該我挑電影了
You pick plenty of movies.
你都挑過好多次了
No. You always picked,and it was always the same.
不 都是你挑的而且每次都一樣
An hour and a half of beach houses in the rain until the woman turns around and realizes love was here all along.
前面90分鐘都在說雨中的海濱別墅最后女主角頓時醒悟發(fā)現(xiàn)原來愛一直在身邊
Come on, that is a great movie, and it starts in ten minutes.
拜托 那電影很棒 而且還有10分鐘就開演了
I hate those movies.
我討厭這種電影
No, you don't. Yes, I do.
你不討厭 我真的討厭
The only reason I went is because you wanted to see them,and I wanted to have sex.
我之所以以前和你一起看 是因為你想看而我想和你滾床單
To this day, I can't see a Sandra Bullock movie poster without getting both bored and aroused.
而今天 我既然不能興奮和性奮還看什么桑德拉·布洛克的電影啊
Okay, so while we were going out,how often would you pretend to like things just to have sex with me?
好吧 這么說我們約會的時候 你有多少次是假裝聽我的其實只是為了和我滾床單
All the time.
一直都是
You're kidding.
不是吧
Does this sound familiar?I'd love to go shoe shopping with you.
那你覺得這些話耳熟不 我喜歡和你去逛街買鞋子
Hiking? It's great.
遠足 棒極了
It' 2 a.m., of course I want to go to Korea Town and sing karaoke with your friends.Who wouldn't?
凌晨2點啊 我當(dāng)然想去韓國城和你們朋友唱K啦樂意之極
Okay, we were going out.You were going to get sex anyway.
好吧 我們每次約會 哪次沒有滾床單的
Really? You would have slept with me after a three hour documentary on dams?
是嗎 你要是看了三小時水壩的紀(jì)錄片 你還有性致嗎
No. No woman would.
沒有 沒女人會有
See? Now, that's the great thing.
瞧 這就是最棒的地方
We're out as friends. This is not a date.Sex is off the table.So, let's go learn how hydroelectric power might not be the environmental bargain you think it is.
我們現(xiàn)在是朋友 不是在約會滾床單沒戲 所以 我們就去看看水力發(fā)電 也許不是你想的那么環(huán)保
Sorry. Spoiler alert.
抱歉 劇透了
All right, fine.
好吧
Thanks.
謝了
Tickets are 11 bucks.
電影票十一塊
Not a date.
不是約會嘛
Come on, Sheldon, Star Wars.
快點 謝爾頓 來看《星球大戰(zhàn)》
I'm pushing play. I mean it.If we don't start soon, George Lucas is going to change it again.
我要按播放鍵啦 我說真的 要是我們再不快點看 喬治·盧卡斯又要出新版本了
This would go a lot faster if you put your trade school diploma to work and helped me set up this highfrequency tone generator.
要是你那職業(yè)學(xué)校的學(xué)歷有點用 就過來幫我倒騰一下這臺高音頻發(fā)生器 那我們的問題就解決了
I have a Masters degree from M.I.T.
我可是麻省理工的碩士生
Yeah, but you've got a cando attitude and that's what's important.
好吧 你好歹有樂觀苦干的態(tài)度 這才是重點
I really don't get your problem with birds.
我真不懂你和鳥有什么仇
The question you should be asking is what is their problem with me?
你該這么問 鳥對我有什么仇
My first memory: A hummingbird divebombing my stroller to get at the apple juice in my sippy cup.
我剛開始記事起 一只蜂鳥俯沖進我的嬰兒車 偷吃了我吸管杯里的蘋果汁
Hummingbirds are pretty.
蜂鳥很美的
Hummingbirds are the vampires of the flower world.
蜂鳥是鮮花界的吸血鬼
Still my first choice for an ankle tattoo.
還是我在腳踝紋身圖案的首選
Or a dolphin I go back and forth.
或是海豚 我在這兩者間猶豫不決
Age seven, a bloodthirsty chicken chases me up a tree.
我7歲時 一只喪心病狂的雞追著我爬到樹上
Age 12, a magpie tries to steal the retainer out of my mouth.
12歲時 一只喜鵲想從我嘴里搶走牙套
Age 16, a parrot in a pet store calls me fat ass.
16歲時 寵物店的一只鸚鵡罵我胖仔
Need I go on?
我還要繼續(xù)說嗎
Yes, please. This is way better than the movie.
當(dāng)然 這可比電影有趣多了
All right, Sheldon,your bird death ray is ready.
好吧 謝爾頓 你的"殺鳥死光"準(zhǔn)備好了
It's not a death ray.It's just a little ultrasonic blast to scare him off.
這不是"死光" 只是弄點超聲波好嚇跑他
Trust me, if I had a death ray,I wouldn't be living here.I'd be in my lair enjoying the money the people of Earth gave me for not using my death ray.
相信我 如果我有"死光" 我就不會住這兒了 我會坐在用不完的錢堆上 都是人們送來賄賂我求我別用"死光"
All right, and in three,two, one.
好吧 三 二 一
That is one tough birdie.
這只小鳥真霸氣
Come on, you enjoyed the movie.
拜托 你明明很喜歡那電影
I saw you tearing up when the village got flooded,and everyone had to relocate.
村莊要被淹沒 所有人要搬家時 我看你都哭了
No, I was thinking how come they get to leave and I can't.
不 我是想為什么他們能走而我不行
I'm going to get some fries.You want anything?
我要去買點薯片。你要來點嗎
Uh, no, thanks.
不 謝了
Are you sure?You always say no, and then you eat half my fries.
你確定嗎 你每次都說不要 卻把我的吃掉一半
I just eat the little crispy ones you don't like.
我只是吃那些酥脆的 反正你不喜歡
No, I love them. I save them for the end,but they're gone because you ate them.
不 我超喜歡 我只是留到最后吃 結(jié)果卻被你吃光光
And why did I let you eat them?
我為什么讓你吃呢
To get sex.
你想滾床單
Exactly.
沒錯
But this is not a date.So I ask again, would you like anything?
但這不是約會 所以我再問一次 你要來點什么嗎
All right, I'd like an order of fries.
好吧 給我來份薯條
Great. That'll be five dollars.
好極了 五塊錢
I am having the best time.
這是我有史以來最開心的夜晚
I'm so glad you suggested we do this.
我真高興你約我出來
Oh, sorry.
不好意思
No problem.
沒關(guān)系
What you writing there?
你在寫什么
A screenplay.
劇本
It's about a guy whose roommate is having sex and tells him to go to a bar and work on his screenplay.
敘述的是一個宅男的室友因為要打炮 所以把他趕來酒吧寫劇本的悲慘故事
I Hope Alex Gets Crabs: The Movie.
電影名《我希望艾力克斯染上陰虱》
It's a working title.
這只是暫定名
I'm Kevin. Oh. Penny.
我叫凱文 我叫佩妮
Nice to meet you.
幸會幸會
I'll let you get back to your date.
我就不打擾你們約會了
Oh, no, no. This isn't a date, no.
不不 我們沒在約會 完全不是
Right?
對吧
Uh... right.
對
So have you written anything I might have seen?
那你的作品有沒有我可能看過的呢
That depends. How much time do you spend on Yelp?
不好說 你喜歡逛大眾點評網(wǎng)嗎
