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暮光之城?暮色 第102期:第七章 夢(mèng)魘(11)

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And I knew in that I had my answer. I didn't know if there ever was a choice, really. I was already in too deep. Now that I knew — if I knew — I could do nothing about my frightening secret. Because when I thought of him, of his voice, his hypnotic eyes, themagnetic force of his personality, I wanted nothing more than to be with him right now. Even if… but I couldn't think it. Not here, alone in the darkening forest. Not while the rain made it dim as twilight under the canopy and pattered like footsteps across the matted earthen floor. I shivered and rose quickly from my place of concealment, worried that somehow the path would have disappeared with the rain.

然后我知道,我已經(jīng)得出答案了。我甚至不知道這里面是否真的有過一個(gè)抉擇。我已經(jīng)陷得太深了。我知道——如果我真的知道的話——對(duì)于我這個(gè)嚇人的秘密,我什么也不會(huì)做的。因?yàn)槊慨?dāng)我想起他,想起他的聲音,他能夠催眠的眼睛,他極具吸引力的個(gè)人魅力的時(shí)候,我只想立刻和他在一起,除此之外便別無所求了。即使……但我不能再想下去了。不能在這里,獨(dú)自一人待在越來越黑的森林里想。不能在這個(gè)時(shí)候,不能在雨水讓天邊的暮色變得黯淡,滴滴答答的聲音就像走過鋪著瓷磚的地板的腳步聲的時(shí)候想。我顫抖著,趕快從我的隱蔽之所站起來,擔(dān)心著那條小路也許會(huì)消失在雨中。

But it was there, safe and clear, winding its way out of the dripping green maze. I followed ithastily, my hood pulled close around my face, becoming surprised, as I nearly ran through the trees, at how far I had come. I started to wonder if I was heading out at all, or following the path farther into the confines of the forest. Before I could get too panicky, though, I began to glimpse some open spaces through the webbed branches. And then I could hear a car passing on the street, and I was free, Charlie's lawn stretched out in front of me, the house beckoning me, promising warmth and dry socks.

但它仍在那里,安全又清晰,蜿蜒著穿過那片濕漉漉的綠色迷宮。我慌忙沿著小路走回去,我的兜帽拉得很低,垂在我的臉旁。我開始驚慌起來,幾乎是跑著穿過樹林,因?yàn)槲矣X得已經(jīng)走了像來時(shí)那么遠(yuǎn)的距離了。我開始懷疑自己是不是已經(jīng)沖過頭了,又或者是沿著小路走到了森林里更遠(yuǎn)的地方。但在我變得更加驚慌失措以前,透過密密麻麻像蜘蛛網(wǎng)一樣的樹枝,我隱約能瞥見一些開闊地了。然后我聽到了一輛車穿過街道的聲音,我自由了。查理的草坪出現(xiàn)在我的面前,那所房子在召喚著我,許諾著溫暖以及干燥的襪子。

It was just noon when I got back inside. I went upstairs and got dressed for the day, jeans and a t-shirt, since I was staying indoors. It didn't take too much effort to concentrate on my task for the day, a paper on Macbeth that was due Wednesday. I settled into outlining a roughdraft contentedly, more serene than I'd felt since… well, since Thursday afternoon, if I was being honest.

我走回屋里的時(shí)候剛好是正午。我走上樓,換上這一天的裝束——牛仔褲和T恤衫——因?yàn)槲視?huì)一直待在家里。全力以赴解決今天的任務(wù)不會(huì)花上太多的工夫,只是一份周三截止的關(guān)于麥克白的論文而已。我心滿意足地投入工作,羅列出了一份粗略的草稿。這份寧?kù)o的心境是我許久沒有感受過的,自從……好吧,自從周四下午以后,如果我足夠誠(chéng)實(shí)的話。

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