8 Elizabeth Learns more about Darcy and Wickham
8 伊麗莎白加深對(duì)達(dá)西和韋翰的了解
The next morning Elizabeth had still not recovered from the surprise of Darcy's proposal to her.Feeling in need of exercise and fresh air, she decided to have a walk. In order to avoid meeting Mr Darcy, she kept away from her favourite path, but could not resist walking a little way into Lady Catherine's park. There she was astonished to see Darcy him-self approaching her and calling her name.
第二天早上,伊麗莎白還沒有從達(dá)西求婚的驚訝中恢復(fù)過來。她感到需要活動(dòng),需要新鮮空氣,便決定出去散散步。為了避免與達(dá)西先生相見,她避開了所喜歡的小道,但禁不住走進(jìn)了凱瑟琳夫人的莊園里邊。在那兒,她驚訝地發(fā)現(xiàn)達(dá)西本人在向她走來,而且還叫著她的名字。
‘I have been walking some time in the hope of meeting you,’he said.‘Will you do me the honour of reading this let-ter?’And, handing her an envelope, he bowed slightly and walked quickly away.With no expectation of pleasure, but with the strongest curiosity, Elizabeth opened the letter, and began to read it as she continued her walk alone.
“我一直在這兒走動(dòng),希望能見到你,”他說,“請(qǐng)你賞光看看這封信好嗎?”他遞過信來,微微鞠了一躬,便快速地走開了。她沒有希望得到多大樂趣,而是懷著強(qiáng)烈的好奇心,一邊繼續(xù)獨(dú)行,一邊開始讀信:
Do not be alarmed,madam,that I shall repeat the offer which so disgusted you last night.I have no intention of mentioning again wishes which, for the happiness of both of us, cannot be too soon forgotten.I would not have written, but justice re-quires my character to be defended.
小姐,請(qǐng)不要怕,我要重申昨天晚上令你厭惡的請(qǐng)求。我無意重提為了我們兩人的幸福而無法很快忘記的愿望。我本來可以不寫,但正義要求我為自己的品格辯護(hù)。
You accused me last night of two very different offences.The first was that I had separated Mr Bingley from your sister,in spite of their mutual affection,and the second was that I had destroyed Mr Wickham's chance of future wealth and happiness, in spite of my father's honourable promises to him.I hope that you will no longer blame me for either of these offences, when you have read the explanation which follows.If I am forced to describe feelings which offend you, I can only say I am sorry.
昨晚,你把兩件十分不同的罪名加在我頭上。第一件是我不顧彬格萊先生和令姊彼此相愛,拆散了他們的好事,第二件是我不顧先父的鄭重許諾,斷送了韋翰先生獲得財(cái)富和幸福的機(jī)會(huì)。我希望你讀完以下我的解釋以后不會(huì)再為其中任何一件事責(zé)怪我。如果我被迫描述惹你生氣的感情,那么,我只能說聲抱歉。
I had not been long in Hertfordshire before I noticed that Bingley preferred your elder sister Jane to any other young woman.But I had often seen him in love before,and it wasn't until the Netherfield ball that I realized how serious his at-tachment was.I was careful to observe your sister closely,and as her manners and appearance were as pleasant and cheerful as ever, I remained convinced that she did not feel strongly about him.I was perhaps deceived by her calmness,and in that case, your anger has not been unreasonable. But I sincerely believed that her heart had not been touched.I ob-jected to Bingley's possible marriage to her, not only for those reasons of social inferiority that I mentioned to you last night,but also for reasons which in my case I had tried to for-get, but which I must state now.The behaviour that evening of your mother, your three younger sisters, and occasionally even your father,was so lacking in social correctness that I made up my mind to save my friend from what I considered would be a most unhappy marriage.If you are upset by my description of your family's faults, it may comfort you to con-sider that you and your elder sister have avoided any share of blame,and deserve nothing but honourable praise for your behaviour.To continue—when I was in London, with the help of Bingley's sisters, who shared my opinion,I explained to him the disadvantages of marriage to your sister.This alone would not have been enough to prevent the marriage,if I had not also been able to convince him of your sister's indiffer-ence to him.Then it was easy to persuade him not to return to Hertfordshire.I do regret one thing, however.Miss Bingley and I both knew that your sister was in London, but we hid the fact from Bingley.In this I consider I was less than honest, but I have no other apology to offer.
我到哈福德郡不久,就看出彬格萊先生在當(dāng)?shù)厮猩倥衅粗辛肆铈?。但是,我以前?jīng)??吹剿剳賽?,直到舉行尼日斐舞會(huì),我才認(rèn)識(shí)到他對(duì)令妹的傾心是多么認(rèn)真。我仔細(xì)地密切觀察令姊的變化,因?yàn)樗呐e止言談一如既往地悅?cè)撕涂旎?,所以,我仍舊堅(jiān)信她對(duì)他沒有強(qiáng)烈的感情。我也許為她表面的平靜所欺騙,當(dāng)真如此的話,那你的憤怒并非無稽之談。但我曾真誠相信她的心未被觸動(dòng)。我反對(duì)彬格萊先生與令姊可能的婚姻,除了昨晚提及的社會(huì)地位卑下等原因之外,還有其他一些原因。我本人企圖忘掉這些原因,但我今天必須說明。那天晚上,你的母親、三位小妹,偶爾還有你的父親,在舉止方面過于不成體統(tǒng),所以我決心讓朋友免于這樣一起我自認(rèn)為甚為不幸的婚姻。如果我對(duì)你家人過錯(cuò)的描述令你不安,那么,如果說你和令姊已經(jīng)免于任何指責(zé),對(duì)你們的行為只能加以贊譽(yù),那么,這對(duì)于你也不失為一種安慰吧!我接著講——我在倫敦時(shí),在彬格萊的妹妹的幫助下(她們與我有同感),我向他解釋了與令姊結(jié)婚的不利之處。當(dāng)然,僅此一點(diǎn)并不足以阻止這場婚姻,我還成功地說服了他令姊對(duì)他并無感情。這樣,我就很容易說服他不再返回哈福德郡。但是,有一件事令我不能安心。彬格萊小姐和我都知道令姊在倫敦,但是我們向彬格萊隱瞞了事實(shí)。在這件事上,我認(rèn)為自己不夠誠實(shí),但我僅能就此道歉。
Your other, more serious accusation refers to Mr Wickham.Here again I may cause you pain—only you can tell how much.In order to show you his real character I must explain the whole of his connection with my family.His late father worked for mine for many years, helping to look after the Pemberley farms.His son, George Wickham, received much kindness from my father, who paid for him to go to school and to university.My father hoped the young man would enter the Church.If he became a priest, I was to give him the post of rector in a village near Pemberley, when it became vacant.But even before my father died, I had discovered Wickham's weakness of character and lack of morals.After my father's death,Wickham wrote to inform me that he did not intend to enter the Church, and asked for an amount of money instead of the post of rector.I knew that,with his character faults,he ought not to become a priest, and I therefore agreed at once.The business was soon arranged.He resigned all claim to the church post, and accepted three thousand pounds instead.I hoped that I would not see him or hear form him again.But three years later he wrote again,this time to ask for the rec-tor's post, informing me that his money had all gone and his situation was desperate.You will hardly blame me for refus-ing.Since then he has doubtless been violent in accusing me of injustice to all who will listen to him.
你的另一個(gè)更嚴(yán)重的指責(zé)是關(guān)于韋翰先生的。在此,我可能再次引起你的痛苦——痛苦程度只有你知道。為說明他的真正品格,我必須解釋他跟我家的全部關(guān)系。他已故的父親為我父親工作多年,負(fù)責(zé)看管彭伯里的農(nóng)常他的兒子喬治·韋翰深得先父寵愛,他供養(yǎng)他讀完大學(xué)。我父親希望這個(gè)年輕人進(jìn)入教會(huì)。假如他成為牧師,我將要把彭伯里附近一個(gè)村子的教區(qū)長職位授與他,如果該職位有朝一日出現(xiàn)空缺的話。但是,即使在父親去世之前,我已發(fā)現(xiàn)韋翰的品質(zhì)缺陷和道德匱乏。父親去世之后,韋翰寫信通知我說他不打算進(jìn)入教會(huì),要求我給他一筆錢,而他將就此放棄教區(qū)長的職位,于是我馬上同意了。一切很快安排妥當(dāng)。他放棄了對(duì)教會(huì)職務(wù)的所有權(quán)力要求,接受了三千英鎊作為補(bǔ)償。我曾希望從那以后不再見到他或聽到他的消息。但三年后他又來信了,這次是要教區(qū)長的職務(wù),告訴我他的錢已花光,走投無路。你很難責(zé)怪我拒絕他的要求。從那以后,他逢人便講,瘋狂地指責(zé)我不講公道。
There is one more circumstance which I would like to for-get myself,but which I must now mention.I rely on your keep-ing this confidential.A year ago,I sent my sister,who is ten years younger than I am, on holiday to Ramsgate in Kent, in the care of a female companion.Unfortunately, there was an understanding between this woman and Mr Wickham,who also went to Ramsgate.With her help and encouragement, he spent a great deal of time with Georgiana, and flattered her so much that she believed she was in love, and agreed to elope with him.She was only fifteen at the time,and I am glad to say that she confessed everything to me immediately,when I arrived unexpectedly in Ramsgate just before their planned elopement Naturally,I dismissed the companion,and wrote to Wickham, who left the place at once.He was doubt-less most interested in my sister's fortune, which is thirty thousand pounds, but I cannot help supposing that he was also eager to revenge himself on me.I hope you will now clear me of all blame in this matter.
還有一件事我自己希望忘記,但必須在此一提。我希望你嚴(yán)守秘密。一年前,我將我的妹妹(她比我小十歲)送到肯特郡的拉姆斯蓋特度假,托付給一位女伴照料。不幸的是,這位女伴早與韋翰先生達(dá)成默契,而韋翰先生當(dāng)時(shí)也去了拉姆斯蓋特。在女伴的協(xié)助和慫恿下,他在喬治安娜那里花了大量的時(shí)間,把她吹捧得天花亂墜,竟然讓她相信她愛上了他,便同意與他私奔。她當(dāng)時(shí)只有15歲。我很高興地告訴你,就在他們計(jì)劃好私奔之前,我出其不意地到了拉姆斯蓋特,她馬上向我吐露了一切。很自然,我辭掉了女伴,并寫信給韋翰,他馬上離開了那個(gè)地方。毫無疑問,他最感興趣的是我妹妹價(jià)值三萬英鎊的財(cái)產(chǎn),但我禁不住也在想,他還急于借機(jī)報(bào)復(fù)我。我希望現(xiàn)在你能在這件事上讓我免受指責(zé)。
If,madam,you doubt the truthfulness of my description of these circumstances, I suggest you speak to Colonel Fitzwilliam. As my cousin and close friend, he knows every detail of these events,and will be happy to support what I say.
小姐,如果你對(duì)我描述的真實(shí)性存在懷疑,你可以問費(fèi)茨威廉上校。他是我的表兄和摯友,對(duì)這幾件事都知道得一清二楚,他會(huì)很高興地證實(shí)我所說的話。
I will only add,may God be with you.
最后,我再說一句:愿上帝與你同在。
Fitzwilliam Darcy
費(fèi)茨威廉·達(dá)西
Elizabeth experienced a variety of emotions as she read the let-ter.She was astonished to discover that Darcy was capable of any sort of apology.It was with a strong prejudice against any-thing he might say that she began reading his explanation of what had happened at Netherfield, and at first she was too an-gry with him to treat him with justice.But when she went on to read his description of his relationship with Wickham, she hesitated.It was so very different from Wickham's story,which she would have preferred to believe. But after a few mo-ments'thought she realized that Darcy's statement was much more likely to be true. She began to remember several things about Wickham which now appeared strange to her.On the first evening she had met him, he had told the whole story about his lost fortune and the Darcy family to her,a total stranger. Then he had boasted of having no fear of Darcy, but had avoided the Netherfield ball the very next week.In addi-tion, he had waited until the Bingleys and Darcy had left Netherfield before making his accusations public. She reminded herself that no one in Hertfordshire knew anything about Wickham's past,so it was quite possible that he lacked morals, as Darcy said. She had to admit that Darcy himself,though horribly proud, had always shown himself to be a gen-tleman. Finally, Darcy would certainly not have dared to refer her to Colonel Fitzwilliam,if he were not certain that his cousin could prove these statements.
伊麗莎白讀信時(shí),經(jīng)受了復(fù)雜的感情變化。她驚奇地發(fā)現(xiàn)達(dá)西什么樣的歉意都會(huì)表達(dá)。她是帶著懷疑一切的目光開始讀他有關(guān)尼日斐的解釋的,起初,她火在心頭,不能公正地看待他。但當(dāng)她繼續(xù)往下讀到他描述與韋翰的關(guān)系時(shí),便有些猶豫不決了。這與韋翰所講的完全不同,她倒寧愿相信韋翰說的是真的。但思索片刻后,她認(rèn)識(shí)到達(dá)西的陳述更加可信。她開始回憶起韋翰的幾件事,現(xiàn)在覺得有點(diǎn)奇怪。她第一天晚上碰到他時(shí),他就向她,一個(gè)完全陌生的人,講述了自己破財(cái)?shù)娜拷?jīng)歷,講了達(dá)西一家。后來他吹噓不怕達(dá)西,可是,就在第二個(gè)星期,便避免去參加尼日斐的舞會(huì)。另外,他一直等到彬格萊一家和達(dá)西都離開了尼日斐以后,才將指責(zé)公開化。她還提醒自己,在哈福德郡,人們對(duì)韋翰的過去一無所知,所以,達(dá)西所說的他道德匱乏是完全有可能的。她必須承認(rèn),達(dá)西本人雖然十分高傲,卻處處表現(xiàn)出紳士風(fēng)度。最后,如果達(dá)西不敢肯定表兄費(fèi)茨威廉會(huì)證明他的說法,那么,他也不敢讓她去找他作證。
She became absolutely ashamed of herself.‘How badly I have behaved!’she cried.‘How prejudiced I have been, I who have always been so proud of my ability to judge people! That pride has led me blindly into making a stupid mistake.Flattered by Wickham's interest, and offended by Darcy's coolness,I have misjudged both of them.Till this moment, I never knew myself.’
她慚愧得無地自容。“我的行為多糟糕呀!”她嚷道。“我的偏見太深了,就這樣,我還總為自己閱人有術(shù)的慧眼而自豪呢!這自豪導(dǎo)致我犯了盲目愚蠢的錯(cuò)誤。韋翰的殷勤使我受寵若驚,達(dá)西的冷靜卻傷了我的感情,我把他們兩人都看錯(cuò)了。到現(xiàn)在,我才認(rèn)識(shí)自己。”
She re-read what Darcy had to say about Jane, and this time was forced to admit that Jane had displayed few outward signs of her feelings for Bingley.Charlotte had even commented on it.Then when Elizabeth looked again at Darcy's comments on her family's behaviour, her sense of shame was very great, and she could not deny the justice of his words.Feeling more mis-erable than she had ever felt before,she slowly returned to the Rectory, where she had difficulty in maintaining a cheerful ap-pearance.
她重讀了達(dá)西關(guān)于簡的敘述,這次,她被迫承認(rèn)簡對(duì)彬格萊的感情幾乎沒有什么外在表示。夏洛特甚至還就此講過自己的看法呢。接著,伊麗莎白再看達(dá)西對(duì)自己家人行為的評(píng)述,更加羞辱不堪。她不能否認(rèn)他說得公正。她感到前所未有的痛苦,慢慢返回到教區(qū)長住宅,在那里,她也很難擺出一副高興的樣子。
Mr Darcy and Colonel Fitzwilliam left Rosings the next day,and were sadly missed by their aunt, who now had so little entertainment that she invited the Collinses and their visitors several times that week. As Elizabeth only had a few days left before the end of her visit, she thought it fortunate that most of her time was occupied. When she had a moment to herself, it was a great relief to walk outside in the garden or the park,alone with her thoughts. She soon knew Mr Darcy's letter by heart. Although she was still angry with him for the proud,over-confident way in which he had proposed, her anger turned against herself when she considered how unjustly she had criti-cized and accused him.She respected his character and felt pity for his disappointment,but did not for a moment regret her re-fusal, or have the slightest desire to see him ever again.
達(dá)西先生和費(fèi)茨威廉上校第二天就離開了羅新斯,他們的姨媽想他們想得厲害。她現(xiàn)在因?yàn)闆]有什么娛樂,便邀請(qǐng)柯林斯夫婦和他們的客人每周來玩幾次。因?yàn)橐聋惿自龠^幾天就要回去了,所以她覺得大部分時(shí)間都有事干還算幸運(yùn)。她獨(dú)自一人時(shí),就在外面花園或公園里散散步,不受干擾地靜心思考,感到很大的快慰。很快,她就將達(dá)西先生的信熟記在心。雖然她對(duì)他求婚時(shí)的高傲和過分自信還余怒未消,但她一想到自己多么不公正地批評(píng)和指責(zé)他,這種怨氣便轉(zhuǎn)向了自己。她尊重他的品格,也為他的失望感到可惜,但一刻也沒有后悔自己拒絕了他,也絲毫沒有再次見到他的欲望。
She was saddened when she thought of her family.Her fa-ther enjoyed laughing at Kitty's and Lydia's foolishness so much that he never attempted to control his two youngest daughters,and her mother,whose own behaviour was far from correct,was completely unaware that anything was wrong.And poor Jane!It now appeared that Bingley's affection had been sincere, and Jane's disappointment had been indirectly caused by the behaviour of her own near relations.
她想到家人,感到一陣悲傷。她父親喜歡嘲笑吉蒂和麗迪亞的愚蠢,但他從來沒有管過這兩個(gè)最小的女兒;她的母親,自己的行為遠(yuǎn)非一般人能夠接受,也完全不曉得出了什么差錯(cuò)。還有可憐的簡!現(xiàn)在看來彬格萊對(duì)她的愛是真摯的,而簡的失望卻是由她家人的行為間接引起的。
On Saturday morning Elizabeth said goodbye to her friend Charlotte, feeling sorry to leave her with such a husband. But Charlotte, although regretting the departure of her visitors, appeared quite content with her domestic arrangements. Mr Collins took care to say to Elizabeth, before she left,‘I do hope,my dear Miss Elizabeth, that you will be as happy in marriage as I am.My dear Charlotte and I have one mind and one way of thinking.We seem to be made for each other.’
星期六上午,伊麗莎白向朋友夏洛特道了別,心里為把她丟給這樣的丈夫而感到難過。不過,夏洛特雖然為客人們的離開感到遺憾,但顯得對(duì)家庭安排還相當(dāng)滿意。在伊麗莎白離開之前,柯林斯先生還特意告訴她說:“親愛的伊麗莎白小姐,我真誠希望你的婚姻能像我這樣美滿。我和親愛的夏洛特真可謂夫唱婦隨,天作之合。”
‘It is most fortunate when that is the case,’was all that Elizabeth could safely reply.
“如果是這樣,那就太幸運(yùn)了,”伊麗莎白只能這么模棱兩可地回答。
By midday she had arrived in London,where she had ar-ranged to stay a few days at her aunt's house.There was,how-ever, no opportunity to discuss Mr Darcy's letter with Jane,until they both reached Longbourn again, at the end of the week.
中午時(shí)分,她到達(dá)了倫敦,她已安排好在舅母家小住幾日。但是,她我不到機(jī)會(huì)同簡討論達(dá)西的信,這一拖就到了周末,她們都回到了浪搏恩。
It was pleasant to be at home again,but Elizabeth was very conscious of her younger sisters'silliness.They were full of the sad news they had just heard, that the regiment was leaving Meryton in two weeks’ time and would be staying for the summer in Brighton, a holiday town on the south coast.Lydia and her mother were trying hard to persuade Mr Bennet to take them to Brighton too, for several months, as the summer would be so miserable in Hertfordshire without the officers.Fortunately,Elizabeth felt sure her father would not agree to this foolish idea.
又回到了家,令人感到愉快,但伊麗莎白對(duì)幾個(gè)妹妹的傻氣十分敏感。她們滿口都是剛剛聽到的壞消息,說什么軍團(tuán)兩周后要離開麥里屯到南部沿海的度假村布賴頓消夏了。麗迪亞和她母親在竭力說服班納特先生也把她們帶到布賴頓,住上幾個(gè)月,因?yàn)樵诠5驴?,沒有了軍官們,夏天實(shí)在難熬。值得慶幸的是,伊麗莎白可以肯定父親不會(huì)同意這種愚蠢的建議。
When she and Jane were alone,she told her sister about Darcy's proposal of marriage.Jane was astonished,but soon her sisterly feelings made her think it quite natural, and her kind heart felt pity for Darcy's disappointment. However,when she heard about George Wickham's wickedness,as ex-plained in Darcy's letter, she was deeply shocked.After some discussion, the sisters decided not to tell anyone what they knew about Wickham, as he would soon be leaving Meryton in any case.
她和簡獨(dú)處時(shí),告訴了她達(dá)西求婚的事。簡吃了一驚,但過了不久,姐妹之情使她感到這一切很自然,她那善良的心胸也為達(dá)西的失望感到惋惜。不過,她聽到達(dá)西信中所講的喬治·韋翰如何奸詐時(shí),還是感到大為震驚。經(jīng)過一番討論,兩人決定不把韋翰的事告訴任何人,反正他不久就要離開麥里屯了。
Elizabeth felt greatly relieved by this conversation.She had got rid of two of her secrets, and was certain of a willing listen-er in Jane, whenever she might wish to talk again of either. But she dared not tell the third,and explain to Jane how sincere Bingley's feelings for her had been. She could see that Jane was not happy,because of her continued warm affection for Bingley. However, there seemed little chance of Bingley marry-ing her now, and Elizabeth did not want to deepen Jane's feel-ings of regret for her lost happiness.
談完話后,伊麗莎白感到無比輕松。她已甩掉了兩個(gè)秘密,而且肯定她什么時(shí)候愿意再談,簡都會(huì)隨時(shí)愿意傾聽的。但她不敢談第三個(gè)秘密,即向簡說明彬格萊對(duì)她的感情是多么真摯。她看得出簡不高興,因?yàn)樗粩鄦酒饘?duì)彬格萊的溫馨回憶。但是,現(xiàn)在彬格萊再娶她似乎希望已很渺茫了,伊麗莎白不想加深簡對(duì)失去的幸福感到的遺憾。
8 Elizabeth Learns more about Darcy and Wickham
The next morning Elizabeth had still not recovered from the surprise of Darcy's proposal to her.Feeling in need of exercise and fresh air, she decided to have a walk. In order to avoid meeting Mr Darcy, she kept away from her favourite path, but could not resist walking a little way into Lady Catherine's park. There she was astonished to see Darcy him-self approaching her and calling her name.
‘I have been walking some time in the hope of meeting you,’he said.‘Will you do me the honour of reading this let-ter?’And, handing her an envelope, he bowed slightly and walked quickly away.With no expectation of pleasure, but with the strongest curiosity, Elizabeth opened the letter, and began to read it as she continued her walk alone.
Do not be alarmed,madam,that I shall repeat the offer which so disgusted you last night.I have no intention of mentioning again wishes which, for the happiness of both of us, cannot be too soon forgotten.I would not have written, but justice re-quires my character to be defended.
You accused me last night of two very different offences.The first was that I had separated Mr Bingley from your sister,in spite of their mutual affection,and the second was that I had destroyed Mr Wickham's chance of future wealth and happiness, in spite of my father's honourable promises to him.I hope that you will no longer blame me for either of these offences, when you have read the explanation which follows.If I am forced to describe feelings which offend you, I can only say I am sorry.
I had not been long in Hertfordshire before I noticed that Bingley preferred your elder sister Jane to any other young woman.But I had often seen him in love before,and it wasn't until the Netherfield ball that I realized how serious his at-tachment was.I was careful to observe your sister closely,and as her manners and appearance were as pleasant and cheerful as ever, I remained convinced that she did not feel strongly about him.I was perhaps deceived by her calmness,and in that case, your anger has not been unreasonable. But I sincerely believed that her heart had not been touched.I ob-jected to Bingley's possible marriage to her, not only for those reasons of social inferiority that I mentioned to you last night,but also for reasons which in my case I had tried to for-get, but which I must state now.The behaviour that evening of your mother, your three younger sisters, and occasionally even your father,was so lacking in social correctness that I made up my mind to save my friend from what I considered would be a most unhappy marriage.If you are upset by my description of your family's faults, it may comfort you to con-sider that you and your elder sister have avoided any share of blame,and deserve nothing but honourable praise for your behaviour.To continue—when I was in London, with the help of Bingley's sisters, who shared my opinion,I explained to him the disadvantages of marriage to your sister.This alone would not have been enough to prevent the marriage,if I had not also been able to convince him of your sister's indiffer-ence to him.Then it was easy to persuade him not to return to Hertfordshire.I do regret one thing, however.Miss Bingley and I both knew that your sister was in London, but we hid the fact from Bingley.In this I consider I was less than honest, but I have no other apology to offer.
Your other, more serious accusation refers to Mr Wickham.Here again I may cause you pain—only you can tell how much.In order to show you his real character I must explain the whole of his connection with my family.His late father worked for mine for many years, helping to look after the Pemberley farms.His son, George Wickham, received much kindness from my father, who paid for him to go to school and to university.My father hoped the young man would enter the Church.If he became a priest, I was to give him the post of rector in a village near Pemberley, when it became vacant.But even before my father died, I had discovered Wickham's weakness of character and lack of morals.After my father's death,Wickham wrote to inform me that he did not intend to enter the Church, and asked for an amount of money instead of the post of rector.I knew that,with his character faults,he ought not to become a priest, and I therefore agreed at once.The business was soon arranged.He resigned all claim to the church post, and accepted three thousand pounds instead.I hoped that I would not see him or hear form him again.But three years later he wrote again,this time to ask for the rec-tor's post, informing me that his money had all gone and his situation was desperate.You will hardly blame me for refus-ing.Since then he has doubtless been violent in accusing me of injustice to all who will listen to him.
There is one more circumstance which I would like to for-get myself,but which I must now mention.I rely on your keep-ing this confidential.A year ago,I sent my sister,who is ten years younger than I am, on holiday to Ramsgate in Kent, in the care of a female companion.Unfortunately, there was an understanding between this woman and Mr Wickham,who also went to Ramsgate.With her help and encouragement, he spent a great deal of time with Georgiana, and flattered her so much that she believed she was in love, and agreed to elope with him.She was only fifteen at the time,and I am glad to say that she confessed everything to me immediately,when I arrived unexpectedly in Ramsgate just before their planned elopement Naturally,I dismissed the companion,and wrote to Wickham, who left the place at once.He was doubt-less most interested in my sister's fortune, which is thirty thousand pounds, but I cannot help supposing that he was also eager to revenge himself on me.I hope you will now clear me of all blame in this matter.
If,madam,you doubt the truthfulness of my description of these circumstances, I suggest you speak to Colonel Fitzwilliam. As my cousin and close friend, he knows every detail of these events,and will be happy to support what I say.
I will only add,may God be with you.
Fitzwilliam Darcy
Elizabeth experienced a variety of emotions as she read the let-ter.She was astonished to discover that Darcy was capable of any sort of apology.It was with a strong prejudice against any-thing he might say that she began reading his explanation of what had happened at Netherfield, and at first she was too an-gry with him to treat him with justice.But when she went on to read his description of his relationship with Wickham, she hesitated.It was so very different from Wickham's story,which she would have preferred to believe. But after a few mo-ments'thought she realized that Darcy's statement was much more likely to be true. She began to remember several things about Wickham which now appeared strange to her.On the first evening she had met him, he had told the whole story about his lost fortune and the Darcy family to her,a total stranger. Then he had boasted of having no fear of Darcy, but had avoided the Netherfield ball the very next week.In addi-tion, he had waited until the Bingleys and Darcy had left Netherfield before making his accusations public. She reminded herself that no one in Hertfordshire knew anything about Wickham's past,so it was quite possible that he lacked morals, as Darcy said. She had to admit that Darcy himself,though horribly proud, had always shown himself to be a gen-tleman. Finally, Darcy would certainly not have dared to refer her to Colonel Fitzwilliam,if he were not certain that his cousin could prove these statements.
She became absolutely ashamed of herself.‘How badly I have behaved!’she cried.‘How prejudiced I have been, I who have always been so proud of my ability to judge people! That pride has led me blindly into making a stupid mistake.Flattered by Wickham's interest, and offended by Darcy's coolness,I have misjudged both of them.Till this moment, I never knew myself.’
She re-read what Darcy had to say about Jane, and this time was forced to admit that Jane had displayed few outward signs of her feelings for Bingley.Charlotte had even commented on it.Then when Elizabeth looked again at Darcy's comments on her family's behaviour, her sense of shame was very great, and she could not deny the justice of his words.Feeling more mis-erable than she had ever felt before,she slowly returned to the Rectory, where she had difficulty in maintaining a cheerful ap-pearance.
Mr Darcy and Colonel Fitzwilliam left Rosings the next day,and were sadly missed by their aunt, who now had so little entertainment that she invited the Collinses and their visitors several times that week. As Elizabeth only had a few days left before the end of her visit, she thought it fortunate that most of her time was occupied. When she had a moment to herself, it was a great relief to walk outside in the garden or the park,alone with her thoughts. She soon knew Mr Darcy's letter by heart. Although she was still angry with him for the proud,over-confident way in which he had proposed, her anger turned against herself when she considered how unjustly she had criti-cized and accused him.She respected his character and felt pity for his disappointment,but did not for a moment regret her re-fusal, or have the slightest desire to see him ever again.
She was saddened when she thought of her family.Her fa-ther enjoyed laughing at Kitty's and Lydia's foolishness so much that he never attempted to control his two youngest daughters,and her mother,whose own behaviour was far from correct,was completely unaware that anything was wrong.And poor Jane!It now appeared that Bingley's affection had been sincere, and Jane's disappointment had been indirectly caused by the behaviour of her own near relations.
On Saturday morning Elizabeth said goodbye to her friend Charlotte, feeling sorry to leave her with such a husband. But Charlotte, although regretting the departure of her visitors, appeared quite content with her domestic arrangements. Mr Collins took care to say to Elizabeth, before she left,‘I do hope,my dear Miss Elizabeth, that you will be as happy in marriage as I am.My dear Charlotte and I have one mind and one way of thinking.We seem to be made for each other.’
‘It is most fortunate when that is the case,’was all that Elizabeth could safely reply.
By midday she had arrived in London,where she had ar-ranged to stay a few days at her aunt's house.There was,how-ever, no opportunity to discuss Mr Darcy's letter with Jane,until they both reached Longbourn again, at the end of the week.
It was pleasant to be at home again,but Elizabeth was very conscious of her younger sisters'silliness.They were full of the sad news they had just heard, that the regiment was leaving Meryton in two weeks’ time and would be staying for the summer in Brighton, a holiday town on the south coast.Lydia and her mother were trying hard to persuade Mr Bennet to take them to Brighton too, for several months, as the summer would be so miserable in Hertfordshire without the officers.Fortunately,Elizabeth felt sure her father would not agree to this foolish idea.
When she and Jane were alone,she told her sister about Darcy's proposal of marriage.Jane was astonished,but soon her sisterly feelings made her think it quite natural, and her kind heart felt pity for Darcy's disappointment. However,when she heard about George Wickham's wickedness,as ex-plained in Darcy's letter, she was deeply shocked.After some discussion, the sisters decided not to tell anyone what they knew about Wickham, as he would soon be leaving Meryton in any case.
Elizabeth felt greatly relieved by this conversation.She had got rid of two of her secrets, and was certain of a willing listen-er in Jane, whenever she might wish to talk again of either. But she dared not tell the third,and explain to Jane how sincere Bingley's feelings for her had been. She could see that Jane was not happy,because of her continued warm affection for Bingley. However, there seemed little chance of Bingley marry-ing her now, and Elizabeth did not want to deepen Jane's feel-ings of regret for her lost happiness.
8 伊麗莎白加深對(duì)達(dá)西和韋翰的了解
第二天早上,伊麗莎白還沒有從達(dá)西求婚的驚訝中恢復(fù)過來。她感到需要活動(dòng),需要新鮮空氣,便決定出去散散步。為了避免與達(dá)西先生相見,她避開了所喜歡的小道,但禁不住走進(jìn)了凱瑟琳夫人的莊園里邊。在那兒,她驚訝地發(fā)現(xiàn)達(dá)西本人在向她走來,而且還叫著她的名字。
“我一直在這兒走動(dòng),希望能見到你,”他說,“請(qǐng)你賞光看看這封信好嗎?”他遞過信來,微微鞠了一躬,便快速地走開了。她沒有希望得到多大樂趣,而是懷著強(qiáng)烈的好奇心,一邊繼續(xù)獨(dú)行,一邊開始讀信:
小姐,請(qǐng)不要怕,我要重申昨天晚上令你厭惡的請(qǐng)求。我無意重提為了我們兩人的幸福而無法很快忘記的愿望。我本來可以不寫,但正義要求我為自己的品格辯護(hù)。
昨晚,你把兩件十分不同的罪名加在我頭上。第一件是我不顧彬格萊先生和令姊彼此相愛,拆散了他們的好事,第二件是我不顧先父的鄭重許諾,斷送了韋翰先生獲得財(cái)富和幸福的機(jī)會(huì)。我希望你讀完以下我的解釋以后不會(huì)再為其中任何一件事責(zé)怪我。如果我被迫描述惹你生氣的感情,那么,我只能說聲抱歉。
我到哈福德郡不久,就看出彬格萊先生在當(dāng)?shù)厮猩倥衅粗辛肆铈?。但是,我以前?jīng)??吹剿剳賽?,直到舉行尼日斐舞會(huì),我才認(rèn)識(shí)到他對(duì)令妹的傾心是多么認(rèn)真。我仔細(xì)地密切觀察令姊的變化,因?yàn)樗呐e止言談一如既往地悅?cè)撕涂旎?,所以,我仍舊堅(jiān)信她對(duì)他沒有強(qiáng)烈的感情。我也許為她表面的平靜所欺騙,當(dāng)真如此的話,那你的憤怒并非無稽之談。但我曾真誠相信她的心未被觸動(dòng)。我反對(duì)彬格萊先生與令姊可能的婚姻,除了昨晚提及的社會(huì)地位卑下等原因之外,還有其他一些原因。我本人企圖忘掉這些原因,但我今天必須說明。那天晚上,你的母親、三位小妹,偶爾還有你的父親,在舉止方面過于不成體統(tǒng),所以我決心讓朋友免于這樣一起我自認(rèn)為甚為不幸的婚姻。如果我對(duì)你家人過錯(cuò)的描述令你不安,那么,如果說你和令姊已經(jīng)免于任何指責(zé),對(duì)你們的行為只能加以贊譽(yù),那么,這對(duì)于你也不失為一種安慰吧!我接著講——我在倫敦時(shí),在彬格萊的妹妹的幫助下(她們與我有同感),我向他解釋了與令姊結(jié)婚的不利之處。當(dāng)然,僅此一點(diǎn)并不足以阻止這場婚姻,我還成功地說服了他令姊對(duì)他并無感情。這樣,我就很容易說服他不再返回哈福德郡。但是,有一件事令我不能安心。彬格萊小姐和我都知道令姊在倫敦,但是我們向彬格萊隱瞞了事實(shí)。在這件事上,我認(rèn)為自己不夠誠實(shí),但我僅能就此道歉。
你的另一個(gè)更嚴(yán)重的指責(zé)是關(guān)于韋翰先生的。在此,我可能再次引起你的痛苦——痛苦程度只有你知道。為說明他的真正品格,我必須解釋他跟我家的全部關(guān)系。他已故的父親為我父親工作多年,負(fù)責(zé)看管彭伯里的農(nóng)常他的兒子喬治·韋翰深得先父寵愛,他供養(yǎng)他讀完大學(xué)。我父親希望這個(gè)年輕人進(jìn)入教會(huì)。假如他成為牧師,我將要把彭伯里附近一個(gè)村子的教區(qū)長職位授與他,如果該職位有朝一日出現(xiàn)空缺的話。但是,即使在父親去世之前,我已發(fā)現(xiàn)韋翰的品質(zhì)缺陷和道德匱乏。父親去世之后,韋翰寫信通知我說他不打算進(jìn)入教會(huì),要求我給他一筆錢,而他將就此放棄教區(qū)長的職位,于是我馬上同意了。一切很快安排妥當(dāng)。他放棄了對(duì)教會(huì)職務(wù)的所有權(quán)力要求,接受了三千英鎊作為補(bǔ)償。我曾希望從那以后不再見到他或聽到他的消息。但三年后他又來信了,這次是要教區(qū)長的職務(wù),告訴我他的錢已花光,走投無路。你很難責(zé)怪我拒絕他的要求。從那以后,他逢人便講,瘋狂地指責(zé)我不講公道。
還有一件事我自己希望忘記,但必須在此一提。我希望你嚴(yán)守秘密。一年前,我將我的妹妹(她比我小十歲)送到肯特郡的拉姆斯蓋特度假,托付給一位女伴照料。不幸的是,這位女伴早與韋翰先生達(dá)成默契,而韋翰先生當(dāng)時(shí)也去了拉姆斯蓋特。在女伴的協(xié)助和慫恿下,他在喬治安娜那里花了大量的時(shí)間,把她吹捧得天花亂墜,竟然讓她相信她愛上了他,便同意與他私奔。她當(dāng)時(shí)只有15歲。我很高興地告訴你,就在他們計(jì)劃好私奔之前,我出其不意地到了拉姆斯蓋特,她馬上向我吐露了一切。很自然,我辭掉了女伴,并寫信給韋翰,他馬上離開了那個(gè)地方。毫無疑問,他最感興趣的是我妹妹價(jià)值三萬英鎊的財(cái)產(chǎn),但我禁不住也在想,他還急于借機(jī)報(bào)復(fù)我。我希望現(xiàn)在你能在這件事上讓我免受指責(zé)。
小姐,如果你對(duì)我描述的真實(shí)性存在懷疑,你可以問費(fèi)茨威廉上校。他是我的表兄和摯友,對(duì)這幾件事都知道得一清二楚,他會(huì)很高興地證實(shí)我所說的話。
最后,我再說一句:愿上帝與你同在。
費(fèi)茨威廉·達(dá)西
伊麗莎白讀信時(shí),經(jīng)受了復(fù)雜的感情變化。她驚奇地發(fā)現(xiàn)達(dá)西什么樣的歉意都會(huì)表達(dá)。她是帶著懷疑一切的目光開始讀他有關(guān)尼日斐的解釋的,起初,她火在心頭,不能公正地看待他。但當(dāng)她繼續(xù)往下讀到他描述與韋翰的關(guān)系時(shí),便有些猶豫不決了。這與韋翰所講的完全不同,她倒寧愿相信韋翰說的是真的。但思索片刻后,她認(rèn)識(shí)到達(dá)西的陳述更加可信。她開始回憶起韋翰的幾件事,現(xiàn)在覺得有點(diǎn)奇怪。她第一天晚上碰到他時(shí),他就向她,一個(gè)完全陌生的人,講述了自己破財(cái)?shù)娜拷?jīng)歷,講了達(dá)西一家。后來他吹噓不怕達(dá)西,可是,就在第二個(gè)星期,便避免去參加尼日斐的舞會(huì)。另外,他一直等到彬格萊一家和達(dá)西都離開了尼日斐以后,才將指責(zé)公開化。她還提醒自己,在哈福德郡,人們對(duì)韋翰的過去一無所知,所以,達(dá)西所說的他道德匱乏是完全有可能的。她必須承認(rèn),達(dá)西本人雖然十分高傲,卻處處表現(xiàn)出紳士風(fēng)度。最后,如果達(dá)西不敢肯定表兄費(fèi)茨威廉會(huì)證明他的說法,那么,他也不敢讓她去找他作證。
她慚愧得無地自容。“我的行為多糟糕呀!”她嚷道。“我的偏見太深了,就這樣,我還總為自己閱人有術(shù)的慧眼而自豪呢!這自豪導(dǎo)致我犯了盲目愚蠢的錯(cuò)誤。韋翰的殷勤使我受寵若驚,達(dá)西的冷靜卻傷了我的感情,我把他們兩人都看錯(cuò)了。到現(xiàn)在,我才認(rèn)識(shí)自己。”
她重讀了達(dá)西關(guān)于簡的敘述,這次,她被迫承認(rèn)簡對(duì)彬格萊的感情幾乎沒有什么外在表示。夏洛特甚至還就此講過自己的看法呢。接著,伊麗莎白再看達(dá)西對(duì)自己家人行為的評(píng)述,更加羞辱不堪。她不能否認(rèn)他說得公正。她感到前所未有的痛苦,慢慢返回到教區(qū)長住宅,在那里,她也很難擺出一副高興的樣子。
達(dá)西先生和費(fèi)茨威廉上校第二天就離開了羅新斯,他們的姨媽想他們想得厲害。她現(xiàn)在因?yàn)闆]有什么娛樂,便邀請(qǐng)柯林斯夫婦和他們的客人每周來玩幾次。因?yàn)橐聋惿自龠^幾天就要回去了,所以她覺得大部分時(shí)間都有事干還算幸運(yùn)。她獨(dú)自一人時(shí),就在外面花園或公園里散散步,不受干擾地靜心思考,感到很大的快慰。很快,她就將達(dá)西先生的信熟記在心。雖然她對(duì)他求婚時(shí)的高傲和過分自信還余怒未消,但她一想到自己多么不公正地批評(píng)和指責(zé)他,這種怨氣便轉(zhuǎn)向了自己。她尊重他的品格,也為他的失望感到可惜,但一刻也沒有后悔自己拒絕了他,也絲毫沒有再次見到他的欲望。
她想到家人,感到一陣悲傷。她父親喜歡嘲笑吉蒂和麗迪亞的愚蠢,但他從來沒有管過這兩個(gè)最小的女兒;她的母親,自己的行為遠(yuǎn)非一般人能夠接受,也完全不曉得出了什么差錯(cuò)。還有可憐的簡!現(xiàn)在看來彬格萊對(duì)她的愛是真摯的,而簡的失望卻是由她家人的行為間接引起的。
星期六上午,伊麗莎白向朋友夏洛特道了別,心里為把她丟給這樣的丈夫而感到難過。不過,夏洛特雖然為客人們的離開感到遺憾,但顯得對(duì)家庭安排還相當(dāng)滿意。在伊麗莎白離開之前,柯林斯先生還特意告訴她說:“親愛的伊麗莎白小姐,我真誠希望你的婚姻能像我這樣美滿。我和親愛的夏洛特真可謂夫唱婦隨,天作之合。”
“如果是這樣,那就太幸運(yùn)了,”伊麗莎白只能這么模棱兩可地回答。
中午時(shí)分,她到達(dá)了倫敦,她已安排好在舅母家小住幾日。但是,她我不到機(jī)會(huì)同簡討論達(dá)西的信,這一拖就到了周末,她們都回到了浪搏恩。
又回到了家,令人感到愉快,但伊麗莎白對(duì)幾個(gè)妹妹的傻氣十分敏感。她們滿口都是剛剛聽到的壞消息,說什么軍團(tuán)兩周后要離開麥里屯到南部沿海的度假村布賴頓消夏了。麗迪亞和她母親在竭力說服班納特先生也把她們帶到布賴頓,住上幾個(gè)月,因?yàn)樵诠5驴?,沒有了軍官們,夏天實(shí)在難熬。值得慶幸的是,伊麗莎白可以肯定父親不會(huì)同意這種愚蠢的建議。
她和簡獨(dú)處時(shí),告訴了她達(dá)西求婚的事。簡吃了一驚,但過了不久,姐妹之情使她感到這一切很自然,她那善良的心胸也為達(dá)西的失望感到惋惜。不過,她聽到達(dá)西信中所講的喬治·韋翰如何奸詐時(shí),還是感到大為震驚。經(jīng)過一番討論,兩人決定不把韋翰的事告訴任何人,反正他不久就要離開麥里屯了。
談完話后,伊麗莎白感到無比輕松。她已甩掉了兩個(gè)秘密,而且肯定她什么時(shí)候愿意再談,簡都會(huì)隨時(shí)愿意傾聽的。但她不敢談第三個(gè)秘密,即向簡說明彬格萊對(duì)她的感情是多么真摯。她看得出簡不高興,因?yàn)樗粩鄦酒饘?duì)彬格萊的溫馨回憶。但是,現(xiàn)在彬格萊再娶她似乎希望已很渺茫了,伊麗莎白不想加深簡對(duì)失去的幸福感到的遺憾。