The worst possible reaction to a yeller is to mirror their behavior. Things do not go well if you yell at someone who is yelling at you.
面對一個(gè)發(fā)怒的人最差的反應(yīng)就是和他們一樣。如果你對著向你大喊大叫的人同樣大喊大叫,情況不會(huì)變好。
There are better ways to deal with a yeller. Below are the steps you should use to handle and hopefully diffuse a yeller.
應(yīng)對大喊大叫的人,其實(shí)有更好的方法。試用一下下面的方法,希望這樣可以讓發(fā)怒的人消氣。
New Words:
yeller: 嘶吼的人,發(fā)怒的人
mirror: vt. 反射;反映
diffuse vi. 傳播;四散
feed into 注入,流入;提供原料
subsequently adv. 隨后,其后;后來
condone vt. 寬恕;赦免
get one's way為所欲為;隨心所欲
address vt. 提出;處理
1. Stay calm and don't feed into their anger.
1. 保持冷靜,不要助長他們的氣焰。
Remember that when a person is yelling, it is not you that has the problem, it is them. It is not worth feeding into their yelling, as the situation will just get worse and things are rarely resolved when two parties are yelling at one another.
記住,當(dāng)一個(gè)人在大喊大叫的時(shí)候,錯(cuò)不在你而在他們。助長他們的氣焰,更加肆無忌憚的大喊大叫,真的很不值得。因?yàn)檫@樣只能讓事情變得更糟,當(dāng)雙方嘶吼時(shí),很少能真正解決問題。
2. Take a mental step back to assess the situation.
2. 退后一步想想,衡量下局勢。
Before taking any action in the situation, pause mentally to assess things. This will allow you to figure out whether it is worth waiting out the yeller or to leave the situation.
在采取行動(dòng)之前,先停下來衡量下局勢。這能讓你明白是不是值得等發(fā)怒的人把脾氣發(fā)完,還是直接離開現(xiàn)場。
3. Do not agree with the yeller to diffuse them, as it encourages future yelling.
3. 不要認(rèn)同發(fā)怒者讓他們消氣,這樣只能讓他們?nèi)蘸蟾鼮閲虖垺?br />
If you agree with the yeller to diffuse them and subsequently agree to do something or say something that they are asking, you are condoning their yelling. By being agreeable to someone who is yelling at you, it only encourages them to yell at you to get their way in the future.
如果你同意發(fā)怒的人,想讓他們消氣,然后緊接著按照他們的要求去說或是做事情,你這是再寬恕他們的嘶吼。認(rèn)同向你大吼大叫的人,實(shí)際上只會(huì)助長他們?nèi)蘸箅S心所欲地向你大吼大叫。
4. Calmly address the yelling.
4. 平靜的應(yīng)對嘶喊。
Let the person know that you will not accept being yelled at, regardless of the situation or problem. Say this politely and calmly, and you are more likely to have a positive reaction, such as an apology or at least make them aware that they are in fact yelling. Some people don't even realize they are yelling. Then your next step is to ask for a break away from this person.
不管是在任何情況下或遇到任何問題,讓對方知道你不會(huì)接受別人的吼叫。禮貌而冷靜地說,盡可能積極的反應(yīng),例如道歉或至少讓他們意識(shí)到他們實(shí)際上是在吼叫。有些人甚至不知道他們在大喊大叫。然后下一步就是要求離開這個(gè)人。
5. Ask for a break from this person.
5. 請求離開這個(gè)人。
When you are asking for a break from the person, it should be more of a statement than a question, especially if it's not your boss. If it's a spouse, friend, or someone else, it is completely acceptable to state that you need a break and time to think things through in order to respond appropriately and calmly.
當(dāng)你要求與某人離開這個(gè)人,應(yīng)該直接的說明而不是詢問,尤其如果這不是你的老板。如果是配偶,朋友或他人,告訴他們自己需要時(shí)間來思考和平靜下,是完全可以被理解和接受的。
6. When you feel your emotions have calmed down, and you know how to address whatever it was they were yelling about, you can now go back to talk to the person.
當(dāng)你感覺到你已經(jīng)平靜下來,而且你明白不管他們怎么嘶喊你都知道如何應(yīng)對的時(shí)候,你現(xiàn)在可以回去和那個(gè)人談?wù)劻恕?/p>
想知道卡卡老師的發(fā)音秘訣?關(guān)注微信公眾號(hào) 卡卡課堂